In some countries, parents who hit or otherwise punish children physically can be arrested and punished themselves. What is your opinion?

In a number of countries, hitting or making other punishments
parents
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for parents
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towards their
children
can be detained and disciplined themselves. I wholeheartedly believe that
such
actions on their
their
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apply
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part must be stopped at the root. In
this
essay, I am going to explain my point of
viewing
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view
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by spotlighting
most
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the most
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essential aspects and bringing some examples. One of the most crucial points is the psychological effect that could
such
behaviour have on
the
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apply
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youngsters in their future
life
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lives
show examples
.
For example
, persons, who have been subjected to domestic violence, become unconfident, and they are unable to make
right
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the right
show examples
decisions in their
life
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lives
show examples
.
In addition
, they
are
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apply
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usually grow up to be cowardly. I am convinced that harmony and love should reign in the family. The second point I would like to point out is the role model that violated at home
children
will apply toward not only their
children
but
also
toward other people in the
surrounding
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surroundings
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. Obviously, they would not be valuable members of society. It is
the
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a
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well-known fact that the best nurture is to be the right role model for your kids. If a parent raises
the
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their
his
her
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hand against his child,
this
can only mean one thing - he is not following the right path of upbringing, he gives up and cannot find another way to
explan
Correct your spelling
explain
what he wants from his child. To avoid
this
, parents need to learn numerous books on how to
upbring
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bring
children
. In conclusion,
children
must be grown up in a safe and
harmonic
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harmonious
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family to become valuable members of society.
This
needs
a
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apply
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hard work from parents in studying methods of effective nurturing without violence.
Submitted by ruben.kirakosyan on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Make use of topic sentences to start each paragraph, stating the main idea, followed by supporting sentences that explain or exemplify this point.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices to link your ideas together more effectively. This includes the use of synonyms, pronouns, and transitional phrases to avoid repetition and create a smoother flow of ideas.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task in a balanced way, ensuring that both the opinion and the reasoning behind it are clear. Extend your ideas fully, providing further explanation or examples to support each point you make.
task achievement
When providing examples to support your points, try to include specific and relevant instances. Generic or hypothetical examples may weaken your argument, so the more detailed and personal the example, the better it supports your case.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and range. Using a variety of complex sentence structures and advanced vocabulary can demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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