Countries spends large amount of money on sports competions.Do you think the advantades outweight the disadvantages.

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Nowadays, the euphoria of

sports

Use synonyms

competitions has

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

increased.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

affect

Change the verb form

affects

show examples

the

countries

Change noun form

country's

countries'

show examples

expenditure as they need

enormous

Add an article

an enormous

show examples

amount of money to realize these events.

While

Linking Words

it is important for them to fund

sports

Use synonyms

events, I believe it should only be assisted up to a point, because there needs to be enough money to aid other public sectors. One of the main advantages of grasp

sports

Use synonyms

games is the

high-exposure

Correct your spelling

high exposure

show examples

to the countries.

This

Linking Words

is because these activities are joined by other athletes from nations across the world,

Linking Words

consequently

Add a comma

consequently,

show examples

people

attract

Wrong verb form

are attracted

show examples

to watch the games and support their own representative teams.

For example

Linking Words

, when the World Cup was held in Qatar, the income of the nation rose significantly as visitors

were interest

Change the verb form

were interested

show examples

to explore

Change preposition

in exploring

show examples

it.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is one of the impactful ways to promote not only the players but

also

Linking Words

the states.

On the other hand

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

phenomenon does

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

drawbacks in terms of money. The competitions required considerable attention from the government which

causes

Wrong verb form

caused

show examples

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of attention to other aspects.

For instance

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

Jakarta was

focus

Wrong verb form

focused

show examples

on preparing

Change preposition

for an

show examples

F1 race, houses and

buldings

Correct your spelling

buildings

were drowned because of

flood

Correct article usage

the flood

show examples

and it shows how the government did not provide enough endowment for

this

Linking Words

area.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, not every society groups feel impacted, they often feel a lot of stress

instead

Linking Words

. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, when a city on a preparation to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

glamorous event, the underprivilege community only experience

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

inconvenience

Fix the agreement mistake

inconveniences

show examples

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

road

closure

Fix the agreement mistake

closures

show examples

and traffic

jam

Fix the agreement mistake

jams

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, the exposure is not directly beneficial for them. In conclusion, despite the advantage of advertising countries through

nation

Replace the word

national

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

competitions, we must take into consideration the disadvantages that

witnessed

Add a missing verb

are witnessed

show examples

lower

Add an article

the lower

a lower

show examples

social community which need enough attention from the government.

Therefore

Linking Words

, in my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

the cons

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

outweight

Correct your spelling

outweigh

outweighed

the positive impacts.

sidneynatasha16Wed Jan 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion which indicates the candidate's position on the issue. However, the main points could be better supported with more detailed examples, facts, or citations where applicable.

coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates an attempt at a logical structure but the arguments can be made clearer with the use of more cohesive devices and clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.

task achievement

Ensure that all parts of the task are answered. The essay could improve by discussing both advantages and disadvantages in equal measure and linking them clearly to the question prompt.

task achievement

Ideas could be more fully extended with further explanation or argument to ensure a clear and comprehensive response to the question.

task achievement

More relevant examples should be used to support the points made, ensuring that these examples are specific and appropriately linked to the arguments.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

promotes
engage
well-being
boosts
revenue
economic benefits
job creation
national pride
unity
cultural exchange
financial burden
misallocation
inequality
exacerbate
corruption
bribery
short-term impact
lasting effect
development

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Countries spends large amount of money on sports competions.Do you think the advantades outweight the disadvantages.

Some people regard with those games as a harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool, others, however, believe that video games are having an adverse effects on the people who played them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?

Populations in developing nations are rapidly growing, people now believe that we should turn to GM crops to increase the production of food grains. Discuss the Advantages and Disadvantages of this approach.

In many countries it is now illegal to smoke in public places. It is only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. Do you agree or disagree? be

Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative impact on the environment ,eating habits and families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many countries have embraced tourism as a way to boost their economies and create Tobs for local residents. However some argue that tourism can have negative impact's on the environment and local culture's. What are the advantages and disadvantages of tourism for a country?