IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Supermarkets should only sell food produced within their own country. What are your opinions about it.

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Supermarkets
Use synonyms
 are places that accumulate a variety of basic day-to-day requirements for people, like supplies, groceries, vegetables, and fruits. Apart from that, all these
supermarkets
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also
Linking Words
 sell
food
Use synonyms
 produced by them.
This
Linking Words
 type of
food
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 is packed in containers and ready to eat at any time.
Supermarkets
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also
Linking Words
 supply their produced
food
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 to the borders of other
countries
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. From my point of view,
supermarkets
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 should only sell their products in their own nation. Because, as we know, weather conditions, living styles, habits, and environments always change from region to region. since that produced packed
food
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 might be good and healthy for their
countries
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 but not suitable for eating for the environment of other
countries
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. like if Canada
is producing
Wrong verb form
produces
show examples
 any
food
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 product
that is
Linking Words
 healthy to eat in a cold environment, but it could be unhealthy for people living in the
Africa
Replace the word
African
show examples
 region as the temperature there used to be extremely high.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 selling
food
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 products in other
countries
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, we have economic concerns as well.
For instance
Linking Words
, if a supermarket brand in the USA sells
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 packed
food
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 in India, it can kill the sales of local
food
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 vendors. There is a possibility of a high
deversion
Correct your spelling
diversion
 rate among customers, which can impact local
food
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 sales and the country's economy as well. To summarize my point of view, I think
supermarkets
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 should sell their produced
food
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 products in their own country only since it is well-suited for those people and it could not affect other
countries
Use synonyms
' economies as well.

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to include a clear introduction outlining your stance on the topic. Additionally, ensure your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reinforces your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating a more logical flow to your argument by using a variety of linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs. This will help improve coherence and the overall structure of your essay.
task achievement
Strengthen your main points by offering more specific examples and clear, detailed explanations to support your opinions. This will enhance the persuasive quality of your essay.
task achievement
Consider exploring both sides of the argument, even if you have a strong opinion. This demonstrates an ability to think critically and shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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