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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development
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In the present time, many businesses are involved in the claim about the new
one
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 for their
products
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. I believe that affecting sales should have innovation for the
products
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, and
this
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 leads to positive impacts for targeted
customers
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. The advertisement has strategies and tactics to attract
customers
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 with not only valuable words related to the new
one
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 but
also
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 innovative claims for selling brand image.
This
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 trend is popular among big companies to boost the selling of
products
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 by involving the new brand image compared with other brands.
As a result
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, the targeted
customers
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 gain some trust and open-mindedness about those
products
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.
For instance
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, the selling of smartphones always claims that the new technology has been embodied for increasing features when the new
products
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 are launched. Samsung and Apple,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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well-known mobile
phones producer
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phone producers
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, encourage their customer to buy new
products
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 by claiming the new improvements in their devices
such
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 as camera, memory, shape, and user-friendly
On the other hand
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, claiming about the new
one
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 have some positive impacts as long as the quality of the
products
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 can be proved.
Firstly
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, the
customers
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 have options to test the between
products
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 shown in advertisements and real
products
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 by introducing a tester or sampler.
This
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 can inform the customer about the originality of the advertisement.
In addition
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, the businesses should open the space for
customers
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 for guarantee. Because of the customer’s experience, it needs time for the customer to experience the new
one
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. In conclusion, the claim about the new
one
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 is part of marketing strategies to increase selling
products
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.
While
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 the affection with
this
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 strategy leads to crucial effects for business, the sellers need to provide the originality of the advertisement and give space for their
customers
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 to try and test their
products
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, ensure that you fully address all parts of the task. Elaborate more on the positive and negative developments and provide balanced views if both are discussed. Offer clear examples that directly relate to the points you are making.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on the logical flow of ideas. Your essay should have clear and logical connections between sentences and paragraphs. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more effectively.
task achievement
Provide stronger, more detailed examples to support your main points. The examples given should be relevant and clearly illustrate your arguments regarding the positive and negative developments of advertising new aspects of products.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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