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Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Goverment should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#goverment #money #railways #roads
Transports is a necessary
things
Change the noun form
thing
show examples
 for
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
show examples
 mobility,
proper
Correct word choice
and proper
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transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
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whereas
train
Correct article usage
a train
show examples
 or car need a route or track to utilize the usage of
vehicle
Correct article usage
a vehicle
show examples
. Based on the statistic, compared to the usage,
road
 have a bigger chart than the
railway
 and I strongly agree that the government needs to spend more money for the
road
 development. There are several
adventages
Correct your spelling
advantages
 to
spend
Wrong verb form
spending on
show examples
road
 development.
firstly
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
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individuals are using
road
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
 and they
able
Add a missing verb
are able
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 to travel and move to
a particular places
Correct the article-noun agreement
a particular place
particular places
show examples
.
Furthermore
, most of vehicles are invented for
road
 which opposite from the usage with
railway
.
Railway
 only used for a specific tranportation which is train. speaking of
railway
 I personally believe that to build a
railway
 spend vast of money, what I mean is
railway
 is to build a
railway
 track is more expensive. To summarize,
In
Correct your spelling
I
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my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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definitely think that the government need to spend more on
road
 routes rather than railways. The implementation of
road
 routes
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
vast
Change preposition
in vast
show examples
 demand. According the actual stats
road
 vehicles are reusable than the
railway
.
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Introduction
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Structure
Make sure to organize your essay into clear paragraphs: an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Support
Develop your main points with specific examples and clear explanations.
Sentence Structure
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
Language Accuracy
Pay attention to the accuracy of language, including spelling and punctuation, to maximize the clarity of your communication.
Task Completion
Aim to fully address the task prompt by exploring both sides of the argument and providing a well-rounded analysis before concluding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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