IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

To what extent do you agree or disagree that Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions.

#visitors #attractions
Admittedly, it seems reasonable that foreign tourists should pay higher fees for local cultural and historical attractions as it can boost
local
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the local
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 economy and
supports
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support
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 the upkeep of historical sites. After all visitors with stronger currencies can afford higher fees, ensuring additional revenue for domestic cultural attractions preservation.
However
, a scrutiny of these arguments would reveal how fallacious they are.
This
 strategy may
raises
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raise
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 ethical concerns, potentially fostering a risk of discrimination and exploitation against foreign tourists, thereby dampening their enthusiasm
of
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for
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traveling
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travelling
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.
Submitted by revicesong.jn on

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introduction conclusion
Ensure that your introduction sets the stage for your argument by clearly stating your position on the matter. Your conclusion should then neatly summarize your arguments and reinforce your stance.
supported main points
Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples or evidence to strengthen your argument.
complete response
To fully address the task, make sure you give a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument before stating your own opinion. Include a clear thesis statement and topic sentences for each paragraph.
clear comprehensive ideas
Aim for clear and comprehensive presentation of ideas by logically ordering your points and using linking words to improve the flow of your essay.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to illustrate your points. This can make your essay more convincing and give it greater depth.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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