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Band 2.5

Some colleges encourage students to create businesses while they are still in school. Do the advantage of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#colleges #students #businesses #school #advantage #outweigh
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Nowadays
,
On the other hand
,
students
 establishing businesses
while
 still in school helps
students
 gain more experience and knowledge they have learned at school to be able to apply in practice.
In addition
,
in addition
 to experiencing hands-on nurturing skills
such
 as
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
, leadership, and time management, enriching an education beyond textbooks.
However
, there will still be disadvantages if
students
 establish a business early and will face many risks.
Students
 who only focus on projects and neglect their studies will delay graduation and neglect their health at work, causing stress, skipping meals, staying up late and waking up early, causing their health to decline. In summary, there are advantages and disadvantages to
students
 establishing a business
while
 still in school, but I think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages mentioned above.
Submitted by thuhong.68hnue on

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introduction
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction that sets the context and states whether the advantages or disadvantages are stronger. Include a precise thesis statement.
logical structure
Develop a well-structured essay with distinct paragraphs for the introduction, each main point, and the conclusion.
coherence
Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas within and across paragraphs, but try not to overuse them or use them incorrectly.
supported main points
Fully extend and support your main points with specific examples or explanations. Each main point should be clearly stated and elaborated upon.
conclusion
In the conclusion, restating your position clearly is important. Summarize the main points made in the body of your essay and ensure the conclusion is aligned with your initial stance.
complete response
Address the task fully by covering both advantages and disadvantages equally and thoroughly. Clearly state your position on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive for clarity in presenting your ideas and make sure they are easy to follow and understand.
relevant specific examples
Include specific examples to illustrate your arguments. They should directly support your main points and be relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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