The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The given two pie charts illustrate the percentage of electronic devices that were used

for

Change preposition

show examples

people between 18 and 25 years old in Canada for watching in two different 10-year

gap

Change to a plural noun

gaps

show examples

, 2009 and 2019. The devices were divided into six types, which were mobile

phones

Use synonyms

, laptops, tablets, desktop computers, flat screens, and conventional TVs.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be clearly seen that conventional TVs were commonly used in 2009,

whereas

Linking Words

in 2019 there was a shift of using devices to flat-screen TVs and mobile

phones

Use synonyms

. As the pie chart shows, in 2009, accounted for 34% of people were watching through conventional TV. In the second position were laptops constituted 20% followed by desktops in the third at 18%. Mobile

phones

Use synonyms

were only used by 18% of people. Meanwhile, flat-screen

Fix the agreement mistake

TVs

show examples

and

tablet

Fix the agreement mistake

tablets

show examples

stand at 8% and 5%, respectively. Regarding the proportion ten years later, mobile

phones

Use synonyms

and flat-screen have almost the same rate, which constituted 27% and 26% each. Tablets stand at the third most used making up 14% compared with 2009.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, desktop computers and laptops experienced a decreased proportion and both accounted for 12%.

Lastly

Linking Words

, a significant drop occurred in conventional TV at only 4%.

2024successieltsThu Jan 25 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words phones with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

196 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

pie chart
percentage
proportion
comparison
device
traditional TV
laptop
mobile phone
tablet
streaming services
usage
trend
shift
technological advancements
viewing habits

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