Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

Mobile phones, nowadays,

contains

Correct subject-verb agreement

contain

show examples

essential features with entertainment

also

. There has been a large growth seen in usage hours of smartphones among youngsters. There are several reasons behind

this

situation and I find

this

development more beneficial than negative. Both the reasons and my view

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

elaborated

further

. The first reason for

Correct article usage

the overusage

show examples

overusage

Correct your spelling

over usage

overuse

of smart devices by youngsters is the social benefit they provide. The

smart phone

Correct your spelling

smartphone

show examples

connected

with

Change preposition

show examples

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

opens up

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

large possibilities, from creating new friends to communicating with them over social media.

For instance

, a child in my neighbourhood chats for hours with his school friends over Facebook (a social media) and

also

spend

Correct subject-verb agreement

spends

show examples

time over online video sharing phone application.

Moreover

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

mobile gaming,

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

multiplayer games, is another major reason for the situation. Children

plays

Change the verb form

play

show examples

different

kind

Fix the agreement mistake

kinds

show examples

of games over mobile for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

entertainment

purpose

Fix the agreement mistake

purposes

show examples

and they involve themselves in games in

such

a manner, that they forget about the timing and other work to do.

However

, I believe that smartphones have

also

increased the knowledge of pupils. It has developed some important social skills,

such

as communication

skill

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skills

show examples

team work

Correct your spelling

teamwork

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and many more, by allowing them to work and play in groups, without the restriction of distance.

In addition

, children can learn through

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

Correct your spelling

watching

watchin'

watchin

Correct your spelling

watching

online videos and reading articles, which ultimately helps them in their studies

as well as

language skills.

For example

, whenever my niece

require

Change the verb form

requires

show examples

to know about something, he searches it over the internet and learns from it.

Moreover

, multiplayer online gaming improves their multitasking ability and it

also

gives them a competitive environment

Overall

, I agree that

overusage

Correct your spelling

over usage

overuse

of smartphones on

regular

Correct article usage

a regular

show examples

basis is harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

them, but if given proper guidance, mobile phones can help them in learning some life-long skills.

Submitted by athaarhdyn on Thu Jan 25 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively sets the context and summarizes the main points.

coherence cohesion

Make use of a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the logical flow of information throughout your essay.

coherence cohesion

While you have provided relevant main points, ensure that each is developed fully with clear examples or explanations to enhance clarity.

task achievement

Aim to provide a balanced argument by discussing both the positive and negative aspects evenly if the question requires it.

task achievement

Consider the question carefully and make sure that all parts of the question are addressed fully in your response.

task achievement

Use specific examples to support your ideas, ensuring they are clearly linked to your main points to improve task achievement.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Water pollution has been an increasing problem over the last few decades . what causes water pllution? How can we prevent the problem ?

Nowadays, many buildings such as offices and schools have open-space designs. Do you think this is a positive on negative development?

Development in technology leads to environmental problems and some people think that the solution to these problems is for everyone to lead a simpler way of life, while others say that technology can solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.