IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some cities have few control over design and construction on housing and office buildings. People think that they are free to choose the design they like. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#cities #control #design #construction #office #buildings #people
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In recent years, controlling residents’ infrastructures has been a heated debate.
While
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 allowing the citizens to exercise greater
control
Use synonyms
 over the
construction
Use synonyms
 of houses and working spaces has a number of benefits, there are
also
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 a few significant drawbacks that have to be considered. From my perspective, I believe that its positive aspects outweigh the negative ones. On the one hand, little
control
Use synonyms
 over housing or working places has a couple of advantages. One of those is that individuality and self-expression are promoted.
This
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 permission allows owners can freely select their
favored
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favoured
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colors
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colours
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, patterns, materials and so forth.
This
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 can result in people’s satisfaction and their sense of comfort.
Furthermore
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, being creative on buildings can generate the diversity of the areas.
Due to
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 the fact that people’s preferences vary greatly, none of the
construction
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 would look alike.
By
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Hence
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hence
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, urban
aesthetic
Fix the agreement mistake
aesthetics
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 can be enhanced and may become a touristy destination.
Nevertheless
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,
this
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 permission could be a two-edged sword. Erecting infrastructures with too little
control
Use synonyms
 may affect the consistency and coherence of the surrounding landscape. Taking Hoi An as an example, buildings in there have
gain
Wrong verb form
gained
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reputation
Correct article usage
a reputation
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 of being
similarly
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 constructed. If several owners
did
Verb problem
had
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 not
follow
Wrong verb form
followed
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 that style, the
unique
Replace the word
uniqueness
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about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 Hoi An
cannot
Wrong verb form
could not
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 have existed.
Moreover
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, a huge amount of
emission
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emissions
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 may be released into the environment
due to
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 free
construction
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. Environment has been one of the biggest concerns of humans and it is
also
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 a duty of people to preserve and develop a sustainable environment. To recapitulate,
whereas
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 little
control
Use synonyms
 over citizens’
construction
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 has a couple of disadvantages, I am subscribed to the idea that the benefits of
this
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outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
former
Correct article usage
the former
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.
Submitted by weezel on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central theme which is elaborated upon with supporting details and examples. Make sure all the paragraphs smoothly transition from one to the next using suitable conjunctions and cohesive devices.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are present, strive to make your thesis statement clearer in the introduction and reinforce your viewpoint more strongly in the conclusion.
task achievement
To improve task response, expand upon the examples provided by adding more detail to illustrate your arguments. Ensure your examples are fully relevant to the specific points you are making.
task achievement
Keep your response focused on addressing the question directly. Every point and example should clearly relate to and support your argument concerning whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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