You are enrolled in a study abroad course in another country. Your accommodation was arranged by the course provider, and there is a major problem with the accommodation. Write a letter to the course provider. In your letter: Introduce yourself and describe the problem Describe the accommodation you thought you were getting Ask the provider to solve the problem Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Mr. Gazeley

#study #course #country #accommodation #provider #addresses #mr #gazeley

Dear Mr. Gazely I hope you are well. My name is Daniele and I am the student who came from Brasil to the Medicine's

Internatinal

Correct your spelling

International

Course, I will begin classes

Change preposition

apply

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next week and I was arranged, by you, to

the

Correct article usage

apply

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room 34 of the

accomodation

Correct your spelling

accommodation

office. I am

wiritng

Correct your spelling

writing

this

letter to complain about

trouble

Correct article usage

the trouble

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, the accommodation was not like I expected. In relation to

this

, I was expecting to get a room with 2 bedrooms, because my friends will visit me sometimes,

however

, to my bad fortune, when I got to the room I realized that I got a 1 bedroom accommodation.

Thus

, It would be very uncomfortable to share it with my visits. In regard to

this

, as you are my course provider, I would like to know if there is another accommodation

availabe

Correct your spelling

available

the

Change preposition

at the

show examples

same price, with 2 rooms. So

than

Correct word choice

that

show examples

I could move to it. I look forward to your comments on

this

matter Yours sincerely, Daniele

Submitted by danielejaegger on Fri Jan 26 2024

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coherence cohesion

Make sure to include clear paragraphing with each paragraph containing a central idea. This helps in maintaining cohesion throughout the letter.

task achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure that you expand on the problem and give more specific details about desired outcomes or actions you expect from the recipient.

task achievement

Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your situation and requests more precisely, avoiding repetition of words.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the logical flow by linking sentences and ideas more naturally using a variety of cohesive devices.

task achievement

Ensure your writing tone stays formal throughout the letter; informal expressions and contractions should be avoided.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

162 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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