Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the factors in modern society that cause this stress, and how can we reduce it?

Recently, stress has emerged as a pressing concern among the
populations
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population
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. globally, it has become a common disorder, affecting the young generation mostly. in
this
essay, I will discuss the problems caused by
this
mental disorder and suggest some effective solutions that might be taken to deal with
this
complex matter. There are various factors in modern society that are responsible for causing acute anxiety in people.
Firstly
, academic studies have a huge burden on younger people.
Due to
inflation, many students can’t afford the expense of a private institute, so they prefer public
collage
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college
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to private. Unfortunately, public sectors only provide fewer seats,
for instance
, 100 seats for 1000 students.
This
creates
a
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apply
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tough competition among the students, and those who fail to achieve, go through
from
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apply
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a
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apply
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severe mental stress which
effects
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affects
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their health.
Secondly
, the internet is
also
responsible for causing anxiety.
Although
it provides many benefits inducing effective communication, it can
also
produce negative effects. Adolescents are seeing war and bombing in the countries, and they are afraid to travel to other corners of the world. To combat
this
, the federal education authorities need to increase the seat number and must give admission on a merit basis so that student work hard to earn their reward. In the case of the internet, parents need to look after their children and must counsel them about the current scenario of the world that we are living in a modern world where everyone is fighting for their right
Submitted by sadiahussain028 on

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Introduction Enhancement
Develop your introduction by giving a brief overview of why stress is a major problem and preview the main points of the essay.
Cohesion
Work on creating a more logical flow by connecting ideas and paragraphs using cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transition phrases, and referencing words.
Supporting Examples
Provide more developed examples and evidence to support your points, ensuring they are directly related to the question of why modern society causes stress.
Task Completion
Ensure you fully address the task by discussing both parts of the question (causes and solutions to stress) equally. The solutions part of your essay currently lacks development.
Conclusion
Consider revising the conclusion to summarise the main points made in the essay and restate the solutions in a concise way.
Grammar & Sentence Structure
Be sure to proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structures for clear communication of ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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