IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people say that having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #time
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People at present have involved themselves in making more
money
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 that, they sometimes forget to have free
time
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 and know about themselves. Having
money
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 with no leisure
time
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 is considered to be a good option for few.
Whereas
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, the other half comparatively think less
money
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 with more leisure
time
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 is best.
This
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 essay will discuss both the views below with relevant examples. In
this
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 fast-paced world, everyone is in a rat race to make as much
money
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 as they can to
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
 their family needs. The first reason is that the prices have increased and even if a person wants to lead a basic life, the minimum amount of
money
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 is mandatory. The other reason could be to maintain their social status.
For Instance
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, In India, Majority of the people work in different kinds of mediums to earn
money
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 for the sake of society's acceptance. The mindset of the people is different in other parts of the world
such
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 as Europe. The majority of the population from these countries prefer to have more free
time
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 than earn more
money
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. They believe in work-life balance and earn only to live rather than living to make
money
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.
For Instance
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, In a recent survey, it was proved Paris, allocates
time
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 to spend some quality
time
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 with family and friends. The stores will be closed mostly during national holidays and open till 6:00 pm during weekends. In conclusion, I would like to say that
money
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 is essential but it is not as important as our health and family. I agree that having less
money
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 and more leisure
time
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 is better to lead a stress-free life.
Submitted by sunj on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure you have a clear and consistent structure throughout your essay. Use clear paragraphs to separate your ideas and use linking words effectively.
task achievement
When addressing the prompt, make sure to fully answer all parts of the question. Ensure your position is clear throughout the essay, particularly in the introduction and conclusion, and avoid contradicting yourself.
task achievement
Back up your main points with relevant and specific examples. Each paragraph should contain a clear main idea followed by supporting details or examples.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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