The mass media, such as TV, radio and newspapers, have an influence on people, particularly on younger generations. It plays a pivotal role in shaping the opinions of people, especially teenagers and young people. To what extent do you agree with this? Please give examples.

Nowadays, when our generation lives in an era of
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
development, people's thoughts are drastically influenced by the
Internet
. It is agreed, that
teenager's
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers'
show examples
beliefs are formed on the basis of what is seen,
therefore
, a high risk for their mental health exists, since
media
space is publicly available.
This
essay,
firstly
,will discuss which positive sides have to be highlighted, followed by an analysis of the main negative aspects of
this
issue and measures which can be suggested to avoid them.
To begin
with, the mass
media
has a bunch of benefits which undoubtedly simplify people's lives.
For example
, TVs and newspapers are useful , because humanity has a chance to be aware of news that affects their lives
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
.
Moreover
, regardless of conditions which can restrict children from the possibility of
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
,they still have the opportunity to do
this
thanks to technology.
In addition
, a lot of conditions exist that force relatives to move abroad, like the war in Ukraine, so the
Internet
provides an ability to keep in touch with those.
On the other hand
, there are a lot of teenagers who can not be deprived of access to the
Internet
, because nowadays it is impossible to live without it. Unfortunately, the potentiality of adverse influences cannot be denied , since the stuff which gets into social
media
is not selected.
For example
,
such
films which
containt
Correct your spelling
contains
contain
information about murders or violence , may affect young ones and contribute to some emotional disorders.
Furthermore
, there is a risk of developing
Internet
addiction, as the time that children spend playing games is unlimited sometimes.
Nevertheless
, parents can avoid pestilential influence by setting a certain amount of time for gadgets.
Additionally
, there is a parental control that does not allow kids to come across prohibited material.
To conclude
,
this
essay agrees that despite of benefits of mass
media
existence, there are a lot of dangerous aspects ,especially for young ones. They have to be controlled by their parents ,
otherwise
, their mental health can be affected.
Submitted by amina.ilyuk8 on

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introduction conclusion present
While your essay presented an introduction and conclusion, the introduction could be more explicit in stating your position, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points to enhance clarity.
logical structure
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supported main points
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complete response
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clear comprehensive ideas
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relevant specific examples
Incorporate more specific examples to illustrate your points. These examples should be relevant and detailed to help support your arguments effectively.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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