The mass media, such as TV, radio and newspapers, have an influence on people, particularly on younger generations. It plays a pivotal role in shaping the opinions of people, especially teenagers and young people. To what extent do you agree with this? Please give examples.

#mass #media #tv #radio #newspapers #influence #people #generations #role #teenagers

Nowadays, when our generation lives in an era of

technology

Replace the word

technological

show examples

development, people's thoughts are drastically influenced by the

Internet

. It is agreed, that

teenager's

Fix the agreement mistake

teenagers'

show examples

beliefs are formed on the basis of what is seen,

therefore

, a high risk for their mental health exists, since

media

space is publicly available.

This

essay,

firstly

,will discuss which positive sides have to be highlighted, followed by an analysis of the main negative aspects of

this

issue and measures which can be suggested to avoid them.

To begin

with, the mass

media

has a bunch of benefits which undoubtedly simplify people's lives.

For example

, TVs and newspapers are useful , because humanity has a chance to be aware of news that affects their lives

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

Moreover

, regardless of conditions which can restrict children from the possibility of

study

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

,they still have the opportunity to do

this

thanks to technology.

In addition

, a lot of conditions exist that force relatives to move abroad, like the war in Ukraine, so the

Internet

provides an ability to keep in touch with those.

On the other hand

, there are a lot of teenagers who can not be deprived of access to the

Internet

, because nowadays it is impossible to live without it. Unfortunately, the potentiality of adverse influences cannot be denied , since the stuff which gets into social

media

is not selected.

For example

such

films which

containt

Correct your spelling

contains

contain

information about murders or violence , may affect young ones and contribute to some emotional disorders.

Furthermore

, there is a risk of developing

Internet

addiction, as the time that children spend playing games is unlimited sometimes.

Nevertheless

, parents can avoid pestilential influence by setting a certain amount of time for gadgets.

Additionally

, there is a parental control that does not allow kids to come across prohibited material.

To conclude

this

essay agrees that despite of benefits of mass

media

existence, there are a lot of dangerous aspects ,especially for young ones. They have to be controlled by their parents ,

otherwise

, their mental health can be affected.

Submitted by amina.ilyuk8 on Sun Jan 28 2024

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introduction conclusion present

While your essay presented an introduction and conclusion, the introduction could be more explicit in stating your position, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points to enhance clarity.

logical structure

Work to create a clearer overall structure for the essay. Your main points should flow logically from one to the next, with effective use of paragraphing to delineate different ideas.

supported main points

Support your main points with more specific examples or data. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

complete response

Ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. Your position on the topic is quite clear, but providing a balanced discussion with stronger examples will enhance the response.

clear comprehensive ideas

Focus on developing clearer and more comprehensive ideas within your essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be expanded upon with relevant details and examples.

relevant specific examples

Incorporate more specific examples to illustrate your points. These examples should be relevant and detailed to help support your arguments effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

336 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The mass media, such as TV, radio and newspapers, have an influence on people, particularly on younger generations. It plays a pivotal role in shaping the opinions of people, especially teenagers and young people. To what extent do you agree with this? Please give examples.

Your opinion

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, the government promotes public transport as the primary means of transportation and discourages private vehicle ownership. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation

Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones.

Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.