Countries around the world require more and more energy every year for domestic and industrial use. What are the causes of this excessive energy consumption, and how does it affect the environment?
There is an increasing consumption of
energy
every year in nations all over the world
for domestic and industrial use
. The main causes of this
problem are the growing population and the revolution in industries. This
can lead to several problems regarding the environment, for instance
, the destruction of nature and the never-ending pollution.
Nowadays, people all over the world
have reached roughly 8 billion. This
great number requires countries around the world
to use
energy
in a great amount for the well-being of all people. This
unavoidable situation is hard to control. Moreover
, in this
fast-paced world
, the
industries have played a major role and grown significantly. They tend to Correct article usage
apply
use
a lot of energy
in order to run the operation and make a lot of profit from it. A concrete example of this
is the mining industry, where they take the energy
without any doubt and sell it to the market at a very high price.
All the problems that have been mentioned above are truly impacting the environment. The destruction of forests all over the world
is really happening nowadays. The deforestation
is leading to the loss of habitats for a variety of species in the Correct article usage
Deforestation
world
, such
as orangutans and Sumatran tigers. Other than that, excessive use
of energy
can cause massive pollution in either water, air, or even land. This
is very dangerous for the sustainability of the earth. There will be a possibility that energy
can't be used in the future due to
this
excessive usage.
To summarize, the overuse of energy
that happens year after year in countries around the world
is caused by the growth of population and industrialization. This
problem leads to natural damage and a high level of pollution.Submitted by fadhlannaufaall on
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coherence cohesion
Look to expand your essay by including clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader on the specific aspect you will be addressing. This will greatly enhance the logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your introduction and conclusion are clear. Your conclusion does well to summarize your points, but your introduction could provide a clearer outline of the essay content that follows.
task achievement
Support your main points with more specific examples and data where possible. Rather than just stating that industries consume energy to make a profit, explain how certain practices in these industries lead to excessive energy use and its direct effects on the environment.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. It's important to not only discuss causes but also to delve deeper into the effects on the environment and possibly offer solutions.
task achievement
Consider expanding on your ideas to be more comprehensive. For instance, discuss the impacts of technological advancements on energy consumption and the potential role renewable energy could play in mitigating environmental effects.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...
