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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart shows requests for information at a tourist office in the United Kingdom from January to June.

The chart shows requests for information at a tourist office in the United Kingdom from January to June.
#requests #information #tourist #office #kingdom #january #june
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The given illustration compares the variety of information request methods in
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom in a
6 month
Add a hyphen
6-month
show examples
 period. Looking at
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
overall
Linking Words
 structure, it is readily apparent that the most
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
 means
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 communication was face-to-face. Even though
preference
Correct article usage
the preference
show examples
 for
in person
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
 and
by telephone
Add a hyphen
by-telephone
show examples
contact
Use synonyms
 underwent dramatical
grow
Replace the word
growth
show examples
 over time, the preference for
by letter
Add a hyphen
by-letter
show examples
 or e-mail communication decreased. ​
Initially
Linking Words
, in January, the number of
in person
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
 contacts started at approximately 400, a number which skyrocketed to
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 2000
till
Change preposition
by
show examples
 the end of June.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
contact
Use synonyms
 by telephone began at approximately 900 in January, stabilized at 1000 between March and April,
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 grew to 1600 after 2 months. ​
In
Change the preposition
On
show examples
 the contrary,
contact
Use synonyms
 by letter or e-mail started at nearly 800 in January, which was higher than the starting point of in
person
Replace the word
personal
show examples
contact
Use synonyms
 method, but dropped to less than 400 in May and kept
this
Linking Words
 number until
finishing
Correct article usage
the finishing
show examples
 period.
Submitted by zeynalli.tarana on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words contact with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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