In some countries, only few young people go to classical music concerts or or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more?
Nowadays, just a minority number of the young population of some countries have a tendency to go to classical
music
concerts
or or
play classical Remove the redundancy
apply
music
. There are some significant reasons behind this
phenomenon which can be discussed. In my opinion, It is good
idea to encourage them
to attend Change the article
a good
in
classical Change preposition
apply
music
concerts
or even play this
kind
of music
.
To begin
with, there are some considerable factors which lead to a lack of people
's attendance in classical music
concerts
or playsCorrect pronoun usage
apply
this
. The first reason is the lack of time
. In this
fast-paced life, people
are struggling with numerous activities which do not let them have sufficient time
. To explain it more, individuals try to boost their level in different aspects of life such
as work, education and the gym. In addition
, in our modern era, youngsters do not invest in these fields. Some countries are diverse and people
acquire taste in other types of music
. For example
, Iranian people
, in particular
young generations like fashionable music
instead
of classical music
concerts
or play this
. As a result
, the more time
go
ahead, the more young Correct subject-verb agreement
goes
people
might not like classical music
.
Having said that, youngsters can be encouraged to be present in classical music
concerts
or play this
kind
of music
. Firstly
, some classical music
is rooted in our culture. preserving this
kind
of music
is a primary responsibility of the present generation. Not only they should protect this
art, but also
they should deliver this
type of music
to the next generation. Furthermore
, classical music
has a wide range of techniques which are entertaining and attract youngsters to a large extent. Adolescents can be entertained with this
kind
of art instead
of surfing time
on the internet and social media which are harmful physically as well as
mentally. Thus
, human beings should be encouraged to attend classical music
concerts
or play them.
As a result
, I think so.Submitted by sr.alizadeh9191 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each part should smoothly transition into the next to maintain logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas and provide clear direction throughout the essay, which will also help in paragraphing and overall structure.
task achievement
Develop your main points with specific examples and explanations to strengthen your arguments and illustrate your ideas more vividly.
task achievement
Make sure to directly answer all parts of the question throughout your essay. It's important that you address the 'why' behind the trend as well as whether young people should be encouraged in detail.
coherence cohesion
Consider using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to introduce the main idea clearly, followed by supporting sentences that expand on that idea.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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