The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The diagram

illustrate

Change the verb form

illustrates

show examples

how

sugar

Use synonyms

is produced from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

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, the manufacturing

process

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will be discussed

steb

Correct your spelling

step

by step. As can be seen, there are 7 steps for producing

sugar

Use synonyms

from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

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. First thing

first,

Linking Words

farmers put

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sugar's

Change noun form

sugar

show examples

seed

Fix the agreement mistake

seeds

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

farm-land to

growing

Wrong verb form

grow

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

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. It takes 12 to 18

month

Fix the agreement mistake

months

show examples

to grow and ready for the

process

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Secondly

Linking Words

, these

sugar

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canes are collected by hand and

collecting

Correct article usage

the collecting

show examples

machine

to be

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show examples

ready for crushing machine.

Next,

Linking Words

they use

crushing

Add an article

a crushing

the crushing

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machine to get

juice

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from

sugar

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cane

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Then

Linking Words

, The

purfying

Correct your spelling

purifying

juice

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is filtered by

limestone

Correct article usage

a limestone

show examples

filter to clear the

juice

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. After that, The

fitered

Correct your spelling

filtered

juice

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is put in the box called

evaporator

Correct article usage

an evaporator

show examples

for heating till

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juice

Correct article usage

the juice

show examples

becomes syrup.

The next step is

Linking Words

called

centrifuge

Add an article

a centrifuge

show examples

, the

process

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separates

sugar

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crystals from

syrup

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the syrup

show examples

. After all,

sugar

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goes for drying and cooling which is the

last

Linking Words

step of the

process

Use synonyms

Submitted by MinaDadashi1376 on Mon Jan 29 2024

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the seventh paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the eighth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, cane, process, juice with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the seventh paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the eighth paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

147 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Some people believe that is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while some think it is best to deal with them nationally Discuss both views and give your opinion

Museums are often thought to be boring, and many people perceive visiting them a waste of time. What do you think is the importance of museums, and how can they be made intersting?

It has been proposed that citizens should only consume food and drink products that have been produced in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?