Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

During the pandemic COVID-19,
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
advancement has changed our livelihood from offline to online, leading
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many
people
to work remotely at home. At the same time, the educational system has forced students to study from home. In my opinion,
this
phenomenon is a positive development for some
people
to
emphasizing
Wrong verb form
emphasise
show examples
their knowledge using the technology. First and foremost, undeniably, our society has to commit to
socialize
Wrong verb form
socialising
show examples
with their responsibility through the internet. One of the advantages is
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
employee's
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employee
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satisfaction rates are
incline
Correct your spelling
increased
show examples
significantly. It is because of the flexible working time, enabling them to do multiple tasks like attending an online meeting
while
receiving
call
Change the form of the verb
calls
show examples
from others or playing with kids.
However
, they should be aware of the timetable of the deadlines.
Furthermore
, since the internet has become affordable and user-friendly for young
people
, they
are be
Change the verb form
are
show examples
able to obtain
a resourceful information
Remove the article
resourceful information
a piece of resourceful information
show examples
from school and the online platform.
For instance
, when teachers ask the pupils to do homework, there are plenty of e-books, blogs, articles, and journals which are free to access from the site.
Therefore
, the opportunity
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cutting-edge technologies will open wider information for students without any boundaries.
To sum up
, transforming
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conventional activities into online
that
Correct pronoun usage
ones that
show examples
support
Wrong verb form
are supported
show examples
by high-tech
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
are beneficial not only for adults but
also
the adolescents
at
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in
show examples
educational stages. Though many
people
might
experiencing
Change the verb form
experience
be experiencing
show examples
the detrimental effects of digitalization, I believe that technology
usages are
Verb problem
is
show examples
highly powerful for
people
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the working level and education system, as long as they
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
use it mindfully.
Submitted by anastania.melinda on

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Introduction
Work on constructing a more clear and engaging introduction that clearly states your position on the topic.
Conclusion
Include a brief conclusion that summarizes your main points and reiterates your view on the issue.
Main Points
Develop your main points further with specific examples and explanations to back up your arguments.
Transitions
Ensure that transitions between sentences and paragraphs are smooth and logical to improve the flow of your essay.
Sentence Variety
Pay attention to avoiding repetitive sentence structure to enhance the readability of your essay.
Relevance
Stay focused on the task and ensure that each paragraph contributes directly to answering the question posed.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote work
  • e-learning
  • accessibility
  • inclusive
  • productivity
  • personalized learning
  • disciplined routine
  • interpersonal skills
  • cybersecurity
  • sustainability
  • work-life balance
  • physical disabilities
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