In many countries, governments spemd large amounts of money on the arts and this is supported by some taxpayers as worthwhile. Others, however think that this money would be better spent on health and education. To what extent do you agree or disagree with these opinions? Discuss, based on your knowledge and experience.

While
some people believe that authorities invest plenty of money into the
arts
instead
of spending more on health and education, others support
such
kind of investment.
This
essay agrees with
a
Correct article usage
the
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necessity of
contribution
Replace the word
contributing
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into
Change preposition
to
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the
arts
, and I will try to explain
this
basing
Replace the word
based
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on
few
Correct article usage
a few
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examples. The first
agrument
Correct your spelling
argument
in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of
this
is the importance of the
arts
in our life.
For example
, observation of numerous amazing sculptures and
painting
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paintings
show examples
fosters a culture of perception of the surroundings.
Moreover
,
such
elements are a bridge between the past and the present, helping to understand how our ancestors saw the beauty and uniqueness of nature, people and the relationships between them. Needless to say,
governements
Correct your spelling
governments
should finance the
arts
to give people an opportunity to have
mentioned
Correct article usage
the mentioned
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benefits.
Secondly
, for small
countries
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countries,
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this
is a good chance to express themselves thanks to their representatives in various types of art.
For example
, my homeland is a rather small country, but the famous composer Aram Khachaturian made it famous throughout the world.
In addition
, if the country
organize
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organizes
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cultural events, it would host
a
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apply
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plenty of tourists, and,
consiquently
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consequently
, would have income into the economy.
Finally
, I do not think that the investment
into
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in
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the
arts
is a big fraction of the national budget,
hence
I am convinced, that
the
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apply
show examples
society should not
warry
Correct your spelling
worry
show examples
about
waste
Add an article
the waste
a waste
show examples
of money. In conclusion,
while
education and health are crucial for any country, I wholeheartedly believe,
the
Correct your spelling
that
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paintings, music, and sculptures play
also
a significant role in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Moreover
, in some cases, art events can be beneficial for society.
Submitted by ruben.kirakosyan on

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task achievement
Ensure that your essay introduction clearly addresses the prompt and presents a clear position that reflects the extent to which you agree or disagree with the given opinions.
task achievement
Develop your main points by including more detailed examples, data, or explanations to provide a more comprehensive argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical progression of your essay by improving transitions between sentences and paragraphs for better coherence.
coherence cohesion
Refrain from using first-person pronouns ('I') to maintain a more formal and objective tone in your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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