Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
There are individuals who argue for prohibiting children from using their
phones
while
at school
, while
others advocate for permitting children to use
their phones
during school
hours. I believe that there are no justifications for this
.
As smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
has
developed significantly over the Correct subject-verb agreement
have
last
5 years, individuals including the
Correct article usage
apply
students
may access the
information through their Correct article usage
apply
phones
easily. In addition
, students
may use
their phones
in class
to find additional resources, which can benefit their learning process. In addition
, current smartphone provides various features to foster education such
as automatic notes by voice, camera
to capture Correct article usage
a camera
lesson
from the Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
white board
, or Correct your spelling
whiteboard
smart
calculator to solve more complex Correct article usage
a smart
calculation
. In India, Fix the agreement mistake
calculations
students
need to bring their phones
in
Change preposition
to
class
in order to do their tasks.
However
, these students
may easily get distracted due to
their phones
, every time they open their phones
, their focus will be lost if there are notifications popping up. Even worse, these kids use
their phones
to play games with their friends in class
, consequently
, they do not follow the lessons from their lecture
. Fix the agreement mistake
lectures
For instance
, many parents in Jakarta high
Correct your spelling
High School
school
Add a missing verb
were surprise
surprise
that their Replace the word
surprised
children
Change noun form
children's
grade
dropped and found out that their kids Fix the agreement mistake
grades
playing
a game quietly during the Wrong verb form
played
class
.
In conclusions
, Fix the agreement mistake
conclusion
peoples
should embrace the benefits of Fix the agreement mistake
people
the
updated technologies Correct article usage
apply
such
as smartphone
, Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
while
school
may ask their students
to activate some features in their iPhone
Fix the agreement mistake
iPhones
such
as turn
off Wrong verb form
turning
the
notifications, and only able to receive messages Correct article usage
apply
for
selected contacts, in order to Change preposition
from
use
the phone wisely at school
.Submitted by dickyoktarizaldi on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure you discuss both sides of the argument equally and thoroughly to maintain balance in the essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on linking your ideas more clearly and cohesively, using a wider range of linking words and phrases.
Task Achievement
Elaborate more on each point with specific examples and clear explanations to strengthen the supporting arguments.
Task Achievement
Ensure you include a clear personal opinion in the conclusion, following the discussion of both views.
Task Achievement
Avoid unsubstantiated generalizations by providing concrete evidence or examples for your arguments.