Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of pre-school age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
When going to the office, working
parents
will leave their children
unattended. It is often argued that taking their children
to a
Remove the article
apply
childcare
is the best solution, while
some believe that it is better to leave them with close relatives such
as grandparents. This
essay agrees that it is preferred to leave the minors
to a
Remove the article
apply
childcare
because they will teach the kids with structured learning.
On the one hand, some people who work choose to ask their parents
to guard their children
because they believe that their parents
will do no harm and teach their children
with love. However
, as their parents
are ageing and capped with a health condition, they might lose their sight when the children
are playing. For instance
, a recent study showed that on average, grandparents’ prime age to guard a child is only up to 75 years old.
On the other hand
, those who need to go to the office from nine to five will take their children
to childcare
since they believe that the childcare
will provide active learning and systematic games for their children
. Moreover
, children
could be more developed and learn to interact with each other by doing so. It is therefore
agreed that childcare
is the perfect solution for working parents
. For example
, a survey in 2022 showed that taking minors
to childcare
for 8 hours a day has made them become more communicative with their parents
.
In conclusion, while
some parents
believe that leaving their minors
with close relatives when working will be a suitable option, some still choose to take them to childcare
since they will provide systematic learning. To that extent, this
essay agrees that unattended minors
should be taken to childcare
rather than leaving them with their grandparents due to
their age and health issues.Submitted by nadillamntr on
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task achievement
Make sure to fully address all parts of the task. Though your essay engages with both views and provides your own opinion, ensure that each view is explored thoroughly with equal depth and detail.
coherence cohesion
Your writing has good logical structure, but to enhance cohesion, consider using a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., transition words). This can help your ideas flow more naturally from one to the next.
task achievement
To score higher in task achievement, expand the range of specific examples you provide to support your arguments. This will make your points more persuasive and your response more complete.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?