Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some
people
like to
work
in a company for their entire lives. Others like to
work
for various
companies
. Which one do I prefer? I would like to choose the second one, and I will discuss both pros and cons in the following paragraphs. To start with,
people
want stable
jobs
, and they go to big
companies
to
work
.
However
, big
companies
still have so many difficulties
need
Verb problem
apply
show examples
to face
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, and many business groups bankrupt because of their bad financial management. Some
people
do not want to
change
a lot in their
work
. They want to do
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things which are similar to what they did yesterday. Changing is always annoying because you have to spend time and money on new stuff, and new things
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
difficult to learn.
As a result
, they do not want to
change
their job. If the present
jobs
are okay to
work
, they would not
change
them. We are unknown to other
companies
. Maybe they are better or they are worse. Some
people
want to stay in a company for a long time,
due to
its benefits. Some
companies
have good bonuses, salaries, welfare, and so on. It is wonderful to
work
for those
companies
. In my view, some
people
change
jobs
regularly because other
companies
are willing to pay more to hire them. Others may feel that the
jobs
they are working on are not their ideal
jobs
.
Therefore
, they are seeking their dream
jobs
. It is great to have several working experiences in
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
fields
Change preposition
of fields
show examples
.
However
,
people
could think you are not a stable person, and they will not employ you. In a nutshell, the aforementioned some
people
prefer
jobs
or
companies
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
they can
work
for
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
a long time. Others like to try different positions or
companies
. For
this
question
Add a comma
question,
show examples
it depends on what sort of person you are. I prefer the second one.
Submitted by edward300225 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Overall, your essay presents a clear and coherent discussion of both views, providing a balanced insight before stating a personal preference. To further enhance your essay, consider establishing a more distinct separation between paragraphs discussing opposing views. This will make your essay even more structured and easier to follow.
Task Achievement
You did an excellent job of addressing the task, offering a comprehensive exploration of both viewpoints and articulating your opinion with clarity. For an even more profound impact, try integrating more varied sentence structures and enhancing the complexity of your vocabulary. This will not only demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency but also keep your audience engaged throughout.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a balanced view on the topic, effectively discussing the advantages and disadvantages of working for the same organisation versus working for different organisations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your discussion, clearly stating the topic and your opinion on it. This structural element is crucial for guiding the reader through your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Longevity
  • Corporate ladder
  • Adaptability
  • Comfort zone
  • Professional network
  • Diverse skill set
  • Industry exposure
  • Innovation
  • Resilience
  • Seniority
  • Job market
  • Career trajectory
  • Company culture
  • Professional growth
  • Job security
  • Promotion prospects
  • Cross-functional experience
What to do next:
Look at other essays: