Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#university #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification

It is highly argued by some sections of society, that

university

students

should learn other topics

in addition

to their main ones,

however

, others assert that they must dedicate all their time and energy to receive a degree,

While

the arguments on both sides are valid, there is, in my point of view, the former group sounds more justified. To commence with, those who advocate gaining

knowledge

in other

courses

as well as

main subjects, declare that

this

trend not only improves

students

' interpersonal skills but

also

improves their career opportunities. senior

university

students

who have literacy in distinct subjects could perform as multifunctional individuals,

thus

being occupied will be easier for them. A case in point would be the recent survey conducted in Germany delineated that the unemployment rate was considerably lower in those who were familiar with various

courses

such

as finance

in addition

to their main ones. There is

also

the flipside, where countless groups of folks argue that

this

scenario prevents

university

peers from ace in their primary field. Undoubtedly, to acquire

knowledge

in areas except for the main

courses

, pupils should spend a staggering amount of time and focus,

hence

it would be nearly impossible to gain in-depth

knowledge

in the areas they study.

Nonetheless

, concentrating on receiving a qualification prepares

university

pupils to become more experts in their field of study. In a well-known

university

for instance

, medical

students

who allocate time and attention to management

courses

failed several medical exams

due to

a lack of

knowledge

To conclude

according to

what has already been discussed,

although

people may vary in their ideas, I vehemently hold that the above-mentioned trend would give a hand in upgrading their interpersonal skills

as well as

career opportunities.

Submitted by maryam.niknamm on Wed Jan 31 2024

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coherence cohesion

You have addressed the task and provided a clear position, but the development of your main points could be enhanced through deeper analysis and more varied sentence structures. Try to enrich your essay with a wider range of cohesive devices and more complex grammar constructions to improve the flow of ideas.

task achievement

Ensure the examples you provide are directly relevant and clear in demonstrating your argument. Expand on these examples to better support your points, and make sure that each paragraph contains a central idea that is well-explained and relevant to the question.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that international trade and communication with other countries is a positive trend, while others think it is harmful to nations and they might lose their identities. To what extend do you agree or disargee with this statement?

Art is considered an important part of a society as wen as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

Today, many people do not know their neighbours in lrge cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

Many countries face the problem of low voter turnout in their democratic elections. What are the problems associated with this and what can be done to remedy it?