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Band 4

level of youth crime is increasing day by day aroun the world. Give some reasons and some sollutions to stop it.

#level #youth #crime #aroun #world #sollutions
In
the
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recent years, crime committed by adolescents
,
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 has been increasing worldwide.
This
 essay will cover on causes and solutions of the problem. With more financial burdens, young parents have less
time
 with their children, as needed to work full-
time
 to support
household
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the household
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 cost of living.
Thus
, the children lack
of
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apply
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the opportunity to be taught how to be
a
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good
member
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members
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 of society
from
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by
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 the parents, especially manners and a good mindset.
Moreover
,
the
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exposure
of
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to
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 improper
contents
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content
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 online is potentially another main reason
of
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for
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 crime
committing
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committed
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in
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by
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 teenagers. Because of
algorithm
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the algorithm
an algorithm
show examples
 of the platform, if they were able to access
to
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apply
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the contents, the more they would see the same type of information. It could
leads
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lead
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 to
perform
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performing
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 those behaviours in the real world. In order to tackle
with
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the issue, more support from grandparents might be a crucial solution, as grandparents can be a great substitution for parents from
time
 to
time
. They
also
has
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have
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 more experience in life, good
advices
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advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
 from them could be beneficial to the child.
In addition
, the online platform companies needed to revise their content policy, to prohibit any violation or inappropriate information on their websites. In conclusion,
the
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crime
from
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among
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 younger people
caused
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is caused
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 by
the
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less
time
spending
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spent
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 with family
member
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members
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,
combining
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combined
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 with the influence of illicit information online.
However
, the problem can be solved by
Correct your spelling
extended
exended
Correct your spelling
extended
 family participation in taking care of the young ones,
also
 the social media platforms
needed
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need
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 to be more strictly
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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that each idea is logically expanded upon before moving to the next point.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include an introduction and a conclusion to frame your essay. The introduction should paraphrase the question and outline the essay's structure. The conclusion should summarize the main points without introducing new information.
Coherence & Cohesion
Support your main points with specific examples or evidence. This will provide a stronger argument and make your essay more convincing.
Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
Aim for clarity in expressing your ideas and develop them fully. Use paragraphs effectively, each containing one clear idea that is well explained and supported.
Task Achievement
The provision of relevant, specific examples is critical. Include real-life evidence or hypothetical scenarios that directly support your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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