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Band 6.5

The chart below show how frequently people in US ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 2013

The chart below show how frequently people in US ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 2013
#show #people #food #restaurants
The chart below illustrates how frequently
folk
 in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 ate
junk
food
 restaurants between 2003, 2006 and 2013.As you can see, A few
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 prefer
ate
Change the verb form
to eat
show examples
 fast
food
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 and never.
According to
 the graph, In 2003 nearly 5
percent
 of
folk
 prefer ate
junk
food
 every day.
In addition
, In 2006 and 2013 have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same rate.
Also
, In 2003 about 16
percent
 of
people
 ate fast
food
 several times a week.
Moreover
, about 30
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
folk
 once or twice a month went to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
restaurants and ate fast
food
 and about 14
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
folk
 a few times a year ate
junk
food
.
Also
, In 2003 5
percent
 of
folk
 never ate fast
food
.
Also
,
It is clear that
 the most of percentage is
blong
Correct your spelling
belong
 to 2006 and 2013
as you can see in 2006 about 33
Add the comma(s)
, as you can see in 2006 about 33 percent of people,
show examples
percent
 of
people
prefer
Wrong verb form
preferred
show examples
 once a week went to the restaurant and ate fast
food
. In conclusion, In the
past
Add a comma
past,
show examples
 a
little
Correct word choice
small
show examples
 percentage of
people
 went to the restaurant and ate not healthy
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
show examples
.
However
, In 2003, 2006 and 2013 a few
percentage
Change to a plural noun
percentages
show examples
 of
folk
perefer
Correct your spelling
prefer
 ate fast
food
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 or never. Ergo, It is obvious that in all
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
 3 years
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most of
people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
 who live in
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 prefer
ate
Change the verb form
to eat
show examples
junk
food
 once a week or twice a month at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
restruant
Correct your spelling
restaurant
.
Submitted by bazarjanimohammadreza83 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 89%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words folk, junk, food, people, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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