Women can do everything that men can and they even do it better.They also can do many things that men can not.But it is a fact that their work is not appreciated as much as mens,although thay have to sacrifice a lot for their family and career....it is said:A woman place is in the home.What do you think

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Females are able to do any kind of

work

Use synonyms

professionally whether it is for men or

women

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, still they are not recognised

similarly

Linking Words

to males.

Moreover

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, many people believe that the woman should focus on being a housewife, even if she is working hard in both her job and in her house.

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show examples

my opinion,

women

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are able to balance

work

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and their own lives and they achieve great results in both of them. First and foremost,

women

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are more organized in their

work

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than men, and

this

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is important for companies as it affects their image. Growing up with the responsibilities of cleaning and organising the house has helped

women

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to be able to notice small details and to control the

work

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in a way that will make it look better.

In addition

Linking Words

, they are more careful than men in doing their

work

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as they are more emotional and love to be thanked.

For example

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, a woman who is working as a bank manager will not just focus on helping the customer, but

also

Linking Words

she will pay attention that everything is organised in its proper way.

Secondly

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, from a social perspective working female will help their children to be extroverted. As these

women

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are working they will make many friends who have kids, and

this

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will help their children to know a lot of kids.

Furthermore

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, females will be able to improve their relationship with their partners because they will deal with too many people and know more about gentlemen in different situations.

For instance

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, a woman who works in the medical sector will have the ability to deal with patients who are in pain, and

this

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will help her to understand her patients during hard situations. In conclusion, whether people think ladies are able to manage everything in a proper way or not, I believe they can and

this

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will help them to increase their efficiency and

also

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improve either their or their kids' social life.

okalqusayMon Jul 22 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that all main points are fully supported with clear examples and explanations. For instance, the statement about women being more careful because they are more emotional could be elaborated further with more details or statistics.

coherence cohesion

Work on ensuring that paragraphs are linked using cohesive devices to improve the logical flow of the essay. This makes the essay easier to read and understand.

coherence cohesion

The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the response effectively.

task achievement

The main points are relevant and contribute well to the task response, addressing the topic from various angles.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

328 words

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