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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In some countries, people are increasingly becoming vegetarians. Do the advantages outweigh it’s disadvantages?

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Introduction
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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 many
people
Use synonyms
 are becoming vegetarians
due to
Linking Words
 many reasons.
This
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 has some
advantages
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as well as
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disadvantages
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.For many
Use synonyms
people
Add a comma
people,
show examples
 the
advantages
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 outweigh it's
disadvantages
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.In
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will show the
advantages
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 and
disadvantages
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for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 it.
Body paragraph 1
Firstly
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,
their
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there
show examples
 are many
advantages
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 for
people
Use synonyms
 becoming vegetarians.
This
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 might assist the
envoirment
Correct your spelling
environment
 and prevent animals from
get
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getting
show examples
 killed.Because of
people
Use synonyms
 will towards to eat
vegtabels
Correct your spelling
vegetables
 and fruits
as well as
Linking Words
 eggs.
Also
Linking Words
, meat has some materials and
chimcals
Correct your spelling
chemicals
 that if someone
eat
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eats
show examples
 it
reguraly
Correct your spelling
regularly
 may
causing
Wrong verb form
cause
show examples
 him heart problems.
Furthermore
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,
people
Use synonyms
eating
Wrong verb form
eat
show examples
 healthy food which is vegan food and that
important
Add a missing verb
is important
show examples
 for their
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
.As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
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that
Correct word choice
apply
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people
Use synonyms
 might be more
prodactive
Correct your spelling
productive
proactive
 in their day.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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,
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
some
disadvantages
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 for should be
consiederd
Correct your spelling
considered
.Which is that the human body
need
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needs
show examples
protiens
Correct your spelling
proteins
protein
as well as
Linking Words
 other
foodstuffsl
Correct your spelling
foodstuffs
,
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apply
show examples
because
it
Add a verb
it is
it was
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 essential for growing bones prosses.
Body paragraph 3
Also
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, many vegetarians
people
Use synonyms
 that are going protests against
salling
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selling
 meat
becauase
Correct your spelling
because
 they think
it's protect
Change the verb form
it's protected
show examples
 for animals.
Moreover
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,it will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 the
econemy
Correct your spelling
economy
as well as
Linking Words
 the market for selling meats.
Conclusion
In
counclosion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
whlist
Correct your spelling
while
 many
people
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 think the
advantages
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 outweigh
Use synonyms
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
, I think the
oppesite
Correct your spelling
opposite
,
because
Add a missing verb
is because
show examples
 these animals were created to eat them and get used
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them.
Neverless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
, it's
thir
Correct your spelling
their
 option to do what they want .

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines the forthcoming discussion points, leading to a purposeful and cohesive essay structure.
coherence cohesion
In the body paragraphs, clearly distinguish between the advantages and disadvantages using separate paragraphs, with clear topic sentences and supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Avoid spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. Errors like 'their' instead of 'there' or 'it's' instead of 'its' can be confusing and affect the overall coherence of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas, providing transitional phrases between points to guide the reader smoothly from one idea to the next.
task achievement
Fully develop your ideas with clear explanations and relevant examples, ensuring that each main point is supported with evidence or an in-depth explanation.
coherence cohesion
In the conclusion, summarize the key points of the essay without introducing new ideas, providing a clear resolution to the topic discussed.
task achievement
Address the task question directly, ensuring your opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages is clear throughout, not just in the conclusion.
task achievement
Make sure the essay consistently maintains focus on the topic without irrelevant diversions, ensuring that every point made is directly related to answering the task question.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Vegetarianism
  • Plant-based
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Deforestation
  • Conservation
  • Ethical considerations
  • Animal welfare
  • Socioeconomic impacts
  • Nutritional deficiencies
  • Stigma
  • Awareness
  • Awareness
  • Informed choices
  • Livestock farming
  • Meat production
  • Balanced diet
  • Essential nutrients
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