Some people believe that reading books is more worthwhile than exploring the internet. Discuss both views

There are different statements about reading
books
being more worthwhile rather than diving into the
internet
. In my opinion, I believe that reading
books
is truly worth the
time
because it teaches
people
to appreciate the learning
process
while
we search about a certain topic. On the one hand,
people
think finding information on the
internet
makes them lazy because they can instantly get what they want. Take,
for example
, some students face difficulties in answering their homework on science subjects. These students want to find out about the functions of the heart but they choose to find them on
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
because it is easier and faster. I believe
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
mindset can lead them to be lazier about their learning
process
and show that the
internet
is less worthwhile.
However
, by reading
books
it can teach
people
to appreciate more on their learning
process
.
For instance
, student need to prepare their history materials about their country, because it is already their final season. In order to tackle
this
issue they need to find sources like their textbooks. Even though they need some
time
to actually read the whole story from that book, as
time
goes by they will eventually understand about their own history. From the example above, it can be concluded that reading
books
is more worthwhile rather than the
internet
.
To sum up
, some
people
think reading
books
is more beneficial rather than searching on the
Internet
. I believe that reading
books
is more worthwhile because it will help
people
to fully appreciate the learning
process
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because by reading
books
people
need
time
to
finally
understand about the topic that they want to learn.
Submitted by bmaharani04 on

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coherence cohesion
Develop a more precise and strong thesis statement in your introduction, clearly stating your position. Certain terms and phrases can be improved for elaboration and clarity.
coherence cohesion
Include a clear conclusion that summarizes the main points and reiterates your stance, ensuring the essay feels complete and well-rounded. The absence of a conclusion can drastically reduce the effectiveness of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical structure by using a wider range of connecting words and topical sentences to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the task are equally covered. Your essay seems to focus more on the advantage of reading books over using the internet. Discuss both sides to fully address the prompt.
task achievement
Expand on ideas with more comprehensive explanations and deeper analysis to demonstrate a better understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Use more relevant examples to support each point of view. These can be hypothetical or drawn from studies, reports, or personal experiences to add weight to your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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