Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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It is often argued that the government should enact restrictions on confined risky

sports

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

others suggest that individuals should have the authority to decide

sports

Use synonyms

or activities as they want. In my opinion, I believe that

second

Correct article usage

the second

show examples

concept

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

should have the autonomy to attend any events that they wish.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both points of view and express my point of view in the upcoming paragraph. On the one hand, the majority of people believe that the government should ban dangerous

sports

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because some effects on physical and mental health are very harmful,

some

Correct word choice

and some

show examples

of them are irreversible.

For example

Linking Words

, recent research has shown that lots of severe injuries

Correct word choice

and aeven

show examples

aeven

Correct your spelling

even

seven

deaths have been recorded regarding mountain climbing.

As a result

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

kind of sport threatens lives; most of them cannot be recovered.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there is another argument about the freedom to select any sport or activity. It is more important to attract more individuals to

sports

Use synonyms

and explore intricate skills.

For instance

Linking Words

, in cue games, they should require mental strength and thinking skills

instead

Linking Words

of physical prowess or strength

Change the punctuation

;

show examples

hence

Linking Words

, freedom is more important in those games.

Moreover

Linking Words

, liberty is a key factor in achieving future

sports

Use synonyms

goals.

Consequently

Linking Words

, there should not be any ban on doing any

sports

Use synonyms

or work to accomplish their future inspirations. In conclusion,

it is clear that

Linking Words

limitations on risk

sports

Use synonyms

are more important to avoid severe injuries to lives and autonomy

play

Correct subject-verb agreement

plays

show examples

a crucial role in accomplishing future goals. I would argue that the government can interfere with dangerous

sports

Use synonyms

to avoid risk and improve their safety rather than enact

prohibition

Add an article

a prohibition

show examples

on attending these events.

nathshasamarakoonSun Feb 04 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay, connecting paragraphs with appropriate cohesive devices such as linking words and phrases.

coherence cohesion

Include an introduction and conclusion that clearly present the topic and summarize the main points made within the body of the essay.

task achievement

Support main points with more detailed and specific examples or evidence to strengthen the argument. Use real-world examples or hypothetical scenarios to illustrate points effectively.

task achievement

Ensure the response fulfills the task by discussing both views on the topic and giving a clear personal opinion. Provide a balanced analysis of both perspectives before stating your opinion.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

prohibit
restrict
public safety
risk assessment
personal autonomy
adrenaline junkie
fatality
injury
economic impact
tourist attraction
caution
supervision

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