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Band 4.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others velieve they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country #velieve
Some humans believe that professionals
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can
work
 in medicine and engineering in the
country
 where they were educated, or if they feel free to
work
 in another
country
,
this
 is their wish.
However
, they can
work
 in professions
such
 as medicine and engineering in a
country
that is
 convenient for them. On the one hand, if
doctors
 and specialists
work
 in the
country
 where they come from, it will be more beneficial to society, and the number of
doctors
 and specialists from their own
country
 will be attracted to them and take
this
profession
, and the
state
 will develop he does, he can
work
 in another
country
 if he agrees to stay away from his relatives.In the
profession
 of
doctors
 and engineers, a new environment in another
state
, following the laws and regulations, agreeing with people, and always being active in their
work
, will increase their experience and career.
On the other hand
,it is good that
doctors
 and engineers study in their
state
 and
work
 there .
As a result
,
this
state
 will become more stable and prosperous .For
this
, you should never stop researching and always
work
 in your
profession
 .For the development of the
country
.You will not rest like states like Korea, America and Europe.We should continue to develop without stopping in the
profession
 of engineers and
doctors
. In conclusion, Specialists and
doctors
 benefit society no matter where they
work
.
Therefore
,they
work
 in the
state
 of their choice depending on their circumstances and environment.
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as conjunctions, pronouns, and linking words) to connect sentences and paragraphs, and to help the reader understand the relationships between different points.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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