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Band 6

the graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 o2020 , with prediction for 2030 and 2040. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

the graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 o2020 , with prediction for 2030 and 2040. summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #prediction #summerise #features #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates details on percentages of residents in four native asian territories
Wrong verb form
living
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live
Wrong verb form
living
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 in urban areas from 1970 to 2020 and with forecast for 2030 to 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, with little fluctuations, all four nations,
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
,
Malayasia
Correct your spelling
Malaysia
,Thailand and Indonesia depicts
Correct article usage
an incresed
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incresed
Correct your spelling
increased
increase
 in their
persentage
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percentage
 of
populance
Correct your spelling
populace
 in urban areas from 1970 to 2020.
However
Linking Words
,
thereafter
Linking Words
, it was predicted more or less a continuous increase nearly
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same rate with Malaysia
stand-out
Correct your spelling
stand out
show examples
 from the rest of the nations. In detail, Philippine natives showed the
heighst
Correct your spelling
highest
heights
 amount
urban
Change preposition
of urban
show examples
 civilization
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 in 1970 around 33% ,and
slight
Change the adjective
slightly
show examples
 less at 30% for Malaysians following them.
Thereafter
Linking Words
,
Philippine
Correct article usage
the Philippine
show examples
 city
population
Use synonyms
 gradually increased till 1980, and
afterward
Change the spelling
afterwards
show examples
,they depicted a sharp rise till 1990 to nearly 50 %
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
 civilization in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 .
However
Linking Words
,
then
Linking Words
 a sudden drop
happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 2010 to reduce
metropolitan
Correct article usage
the metropolitan
show examples
 area
population
Use synonyms
 to approximately 40 %
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the sum .
After
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, steady urbanisation of
population
Use synonyms
 happened in
Philiphines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
 up to 2020 and
fore cast
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forecast
show examples
 till 2040,
also
Linking Words
followed
Wrong verb form
following
show examples
 the same trend.
onthe
Correct your spelling
On the
other hand
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
,
Philipine
Correct your spelling
Philippine
 people in metro areas gradually increased with
varing
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varying
 rates
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 2020, and
fore cast
Correct your spelling
forecast
show examples
 followed the same trend to
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
 nearly 80% urban civilization in 2040,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 was the highest foresighted urban
population
Use synonyms
 in these four countries.
Submitted by dinaka0001 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, thereafter".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "depicts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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