nowadays many people choose to be self-employed , rather than to work for a company or oraganisation.why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

#people #work #company #oraganisation #be #case

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A group of individuals present the view that

self-employed

Add a missing verb

being self-employed

show examples

is more

nessesary

Correct your spelling

necessary

modern

Add an article

the modern

show examples

world,

whereas

others believe

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

for a company or organisation is better. In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

will attempt to outline both ideas and provide my perspective. The proponents of

self-employed

Add an article

the self-employed

show examples

notion are of the opinion that money earned is more

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

sufficient in

this

case. These days,

Change preposition

with

show examples

progressing technology, people's

cosume

Correct word choice

consumption has

show examples

icrease

Correct your spelling

increased

so they need more income to

satisfied

Add a missing verb

be satisfied

show examples

. The income is unlimited in

this

case so

individuals

Change noun form

individuals'

individual's

show examples

concern

Fix the agreement mistake

concerns

show examples

decrease

Change the verb form

decreases

show examples

However

, the opponents believe that working as

employee

Add an article

an employee

show examples

is more safe and

Correct quantifier usage

more unstressful

show examples

unstressful

Replace the word

stressful

show examples

Staff

Add an article

The staff

show examples

knows their salaries

Change the preposition

show examples

the end of

month

Add an article

the month

show examples

and they can manage their money for saving and buying. They think working for

boss

Correct article usage

a boss

show examples

has less responsibility for them I found myself favouring the first concept as I believe that

work

Wrong verb form

working

show examples

company

Add an article

a company

show examples

with other

colligues

Correct your spelling

colleagues

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

me more active and happier. I am

intereted

Correct your spelling

interested

in doing work together. To

coclude

Correct your spelling

conclude

, Both

idea

Change to a plural noun

ideas

show examples

is correct and

complettly

Correct your spelling

completely

depends

Correct subject-verb agreement

depend

show examples

on people's

carectore

Correct your spelling

caricature

to choose one of them .

Submitted by maryam_baou on Wed Feb 07 2024

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structure

Your essay needs clearer organization, with distinct paragraphs for the introduction, main points, and conclusion. It is hard to follow your argument without clear separation and development of ideas. Use topic sentences to introduce your paragraphs and subsequent sentences to develop your points more thoroughly.

examples

The essay's topic sentences and main points need to be supported by specific examples and further explanation. For instance, when discussing the benefits of self-employment, give real-life examples of individuals whose income increased due to self-employment.

task response

The essay attempts to discuss the given topic but falls short in task response as the ideas are not fully developed, and the prompt about the disadvantages of being self-employed is not addressed properly. Make sure to cover both parts of the question in equal measure.

grammar

There are noticeable grammar errors and spelling issues throughout the essay. These detract from the clarity of your message. Please pay attention to subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, verb tenses, and spelling (e.g., 'consume' instead of 'cosume', 'character' instead of 'carectore'). Proofread your work to avoid these mistakes.

conclusion

A conclusion should summarize the points discussed in the essay and should not introduce new information or perspectives. Work on restating your main points succinctly and clearly in your conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

175 words

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nowadays many people choose to be self-employed , rather than to work for a company or oraganisation.why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Fully explain your ideas

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is important for people Why might this be the case Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitat and some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

many people aim to achieve a balance between work and other parts of lives, but few people achieve it. what are the causes of the problem? how to overcome it?