Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.
Rapid urbanization has resulted in overcrowding in metropolises, leading to various issues. Around the world, big cities develop and grow swiftly,
while
the population exceeds the limit. A majority of people are moving to large cities for a prosperous life, facing the biggest complications that are emerging from high unemployment and city congestion. Linking Words
Thus
, establishing new companies and infrastructure improvements could be the options to address these problems.
Linking Words
To begin
with, the foremost issues caused by overcrowding in towns are not only increasing the level of underemployment but Linking Words
also
enhancing metropolitan crowding. To elaborate Linking Words
further
, in municipal areas, there are not sufficient open vacancies Linking Words
due to
a few numbers of companies for thousands of workers who are seeking jobs. Linking Words
Additionally
, in their daily routine, dwellers commute to work on narrow roads by cars, leading to a drastic increase in the quantity of units used. That's why, public transport is not capable of carrying passengers, resulting in overcrowded buses and subways, where crowd crushes occur relatively. Linking Words
Hence
, these problems have created urban traffic jams. As a matter of fact, Linking Words
such
worries can be seen in every municipality on Earth.
Linking Words
Nevertheless
, a myriad of effective solutions can be resolved by authorities and humans themselves to cope with these concerns. Linking Words
Firstly
, to reduce joblessness, the government must launch more businesses and involve companies in opening branches. As an example, Uzbekistan, a country in central Asia, attracted Nike to set up a factory for production, Linking Words
therefore
, many citizens have opportunities to be hired now. Linking Words
Secondly
, the worry about urban congestion, which triggers concerns among citizens, is conducive to resolution by adjusting the carrying capacity of roads and running more transport with diverse bus routes. Linking Words
For instance
, Almaty City experienced a similar scenario of unemployment and crowdedness 10 years ago. Linking Words
Furthermore
, the local government decided to expand the roads, Linking Words
consequently
, it was a successful idea to deal with a road blockage. Linking Words
Moreover
, the number of buses had escalated, allowing to escape overcrowding.
In conclusion, despite our population growing and creating more conditions for a tough life, humanity is capable of tackling everything. Worklessness and city traffic are manageable with the government and society's collaboration.Linking Words
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coherence cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, at least two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Overall, you did this well, but ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to bind your ideas together more effectively. While you used some linking words, adding more varied connectors could improve the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with more detailed and specifically relevant examples, as this will strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure that you address the task fully by covering all parts of the prompt. While you identified problems and solutions, providing a more detailed exploration of each would enhance your task response.
task achievement
Make sure your ideas are explained clearly and comprehensively. Work on fleshing out your explanations and providing deeper insights into the issues and solutions you suggest.
task achievement
Incorporate more relevant, specific examples that directly support your points. These examples need to be fully developed to demonstrate their relevance to the topic and to enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example