It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child's development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays the most significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words.

Generally
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Generally,
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people consider
media
, pop culture, and
friends
have
Verb problem
to be
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fundamental
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
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children
Change noun form
children's
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development
.
On the other hand
, some people
claimed
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claim
show examples
,
biggest
Correct article usage
the biggest
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significant
development
of
child
Correct article usage
a child
show examples
came
Wrong verb form
comes
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from their family itself. In my opinion, a combination of the two
have
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has
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many effects
for
Change preposition
on
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children
. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
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hand, with
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
advance
Fix the agreement mistake
advances
show examples
children
can access
media
and pop culture which can be
influce
Correct your spelling
influence
influenced
for
children
.
Children
absorb the information through television programs and social
media
platforms.
In addition
,
children
can shape their attitudes, beliefs,
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
and
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
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perceptions.
Additionally
, gathering with
friends
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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a crucial role during
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
development
,
children
can sharpen their
comunication
Correct your spelling
communication
and social skills. The interactions between their circle
give
Verb problem
apply
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impact for
child
development
,
Correct word choice
and influce
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influce
Correct your spelling
influence
their hobbies and
interest
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interests
show examples
which can affect
for
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apply
show examples
children
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children's
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decision-making skills.
On the other hand
, the family more
concern
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concerned
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of
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about
show examples
Correct article usage
the child
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child
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child's
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upbringing. parents being role models and educators during
Correct article usage
a child
show examples
Change noun form
child's
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child
Change noun form
child's
show examples
formative years. they teach their
children
about live lessons and
also
they provide emotional support for their
children
which
all
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is of paramount importance to
child
development
.
Additionally
,
relationship
Add an article
the relationship
show examples
between parents and
child
can sharpen
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
self-confidence. In conclusion,
media
, pop culture, and
friends
have
significants
Correct your spelling
significance
show examples
for
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
show examples
also
the family plays
role
Add an article
a role
the role
show examples
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
their skills. Each factors
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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contributely
Correct your spelling
contributes
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
show examples
, from the outside
children
can learn from
media
and
friends
while
from the inside it
came
Wrong verb form
comes
show examples
from their family.
also
Add a comma
also,
show examples
children
can receive
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
support from family which can
give
Verb problem
apply
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
their self-esteem in their success
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
.
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task response
Your introduction should clearly introduce both views mentioned in the prompt as well as your own opinion. Make sure to distinguish your opinion from the discussion points.
task response
Try to develop your paragraphs with clear and distinct main ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence and subsequent sentences should support this main idea with details or examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on clear transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Use cohesive devices such as linking words and phrases to show the connections between your ideas.
task response
Include relevant and specific examples to support your points. These examples make your arguments stronger and more compelling.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion should summarize the main points discussed and restate your opinion. Ensure it does not introduce new information.
coherence cohesion
Check for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors, as these can affect the clarity of your ideas and the overall coherence of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • development
  • media
  • pop culture
  • peers
  • family
  • social skills
  • beliefs
  • values
  • emotional support
  • moral guidance
  • aspirations
  • self-image
  • social development
  • value system
  • harmony
  • conflict
  • significant
  • behaviors
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