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Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Average rainfall for australia for last year by month

#rainfall #australia #year #month
The bar chart illustrates the common
rainfall
happened
Correct pronoun usage
that happened
show examples
last
 year in Australia on
monthly
Correct article usage
a monthly
show examples
 bases and
line
Correct article usage
the line
show examples
graph
 depict aggregate
rainfall
 in
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 40 years on
month-by-
Correct article usage
a month-by-month
show examples
month
bases
Fix the agreement mistake
basis
show examples
.
Overall
,
January
month
 was higher for both years,
where as
Correct your spelling
whereas
show examples
 August
month
 was
lowest
Change the article
the lowest
show examples
rainfall
 in the country. Both
graph
 and bar chart
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
continues
Correct subject-verb agreement
continue
show examples
declined
Verb problem
to decline
show examples
 mid
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the year. It is conspicuous that
January
month
 showed about 60
mm
 which slightly declined in February,
furthermore
, with little growth in March about 60mm
then
 dramatically decreased in April and some increase in May. August and October months were lowest
rainfall
. From October, it can be seen significantly increased and slightly declined in December. Probing ahead, for
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 40 years,
line
Correct article usage
the line
show examples
graph
shown
Wrong verb form
shows
show examples
 about 80mm
rainfall
Change preposition
of rainfall
show examples
 in the
month
 of
January
 with
sharp
Correct article usage
a sharp
show examples
declined
Replace the word
decline
show examples
 till April, which was less than 20mm and
May
Change preposition
in May
show examples
month
rainfall
 increased from 20mm to 40mm almost double. From May, it
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
started
declined
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
 till October, which is about 5mm, again it is noticed about 50mm
rainfall
Change preposition
of rainfall
show examples
 in November and
little
Correct article usage
a little
show examples
 decrease in December. It can be seen both
bar
Correct article usage
the bar
show examples
 chart and line
graph
 on higher in
January
month
 and
started
Add the particle
started to
show examples
 decline up to September.
Submitted by rbtech65 on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that all parts of the essay prompt are fully addressed, and provide a more detailed overview of the charts, including comparisons and trends.
coherence cohesion
For a better score in coherence and cohesion, structure your essay more logically by grouping related information together and using a wider range of cohesive devices.
coherence cohesion
Introduce a clear introductory paragraph that outlines the main features of the charts, followed by a concluding paragraph that summarizes the key points without introducing new information.
task achievement
Support your main points with more detailed explanations and specific data from the graphs to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the information presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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