IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve the growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What measures do you think might be effective?

It is widely believed that
pollution
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 and
traffic
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problems
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 have become one of the most serious
problems
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 of our time.
While
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 some people argue about whether increasing petrol
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 can contribute to resolving
traffic
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 and
air
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pollution
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issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
, others believe that by doing
so
Punctuation problem
so,
show examples
 the problem won't be solved completely.
This
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 essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own opinion. On the one hand, increasing petrol price might seem an
affective
Use the right word
effective
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 tool
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 decreasing
traffic
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 and solving
air
Use synonyms
pollution
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. By doing so, some people think that it can
forse
Correct your spelling
force
 individuals to use their cars less and use
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public transport more, because
this
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 might help the environment and reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, cars are not the only reason that might lead to
air
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pollution
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. We should consider all the possible
problems
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 that might lead to
rising
Wrong verb form
the rise of
show examples
such
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 issues.
For example
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, industrial activities can
also
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 lead to increasing
air
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pollution
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 in the world.
Moreover
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, I believe that governments should implement policies to raise
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awareness among countries, which can contribute positively to our planet
overall
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.
Furthermore
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, I think that each and every one of us is important to society. Each individual should help reduce
air
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pollution
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 by doing simple actions,
such
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 as
seperating
Correct your spelling
separating
 waste,
redusing
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reducing
 energy consumption and using
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public transport.
Additionally
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, we should encourage and foster our children to do
such
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 actions as well in order to increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awaraness
Correct your spelling
awareness
 and protect our nature.
This
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 might contribute well to our future generations. In conclusion, I believe that both ways are
importand
Correct your spelling
important
 in
rerms
Correct your spelling
terms
 of solving the problem of growing
traffic
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 and
pollution
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problems
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.
Nevertheless
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, I believe that we should take a look at the whole picture and take into
considuration
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consideration
 all the ways that can harm our planet. By doing so, I strongly believe that we could protect the environment and reduce growing
traffic
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.

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task response
Make your view clear at the start and stay with it to the end.
task response
Give strong reasons and small, real examples for each point.
coherence
Group ideas in clear paragraphs; each paragraph has one main idea.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas are linked; avoid long gaps.
language
Check spelling and use simple words; fix common mistakes like 'separating', 'reducing', 'awareness'.
task response
End with a clear plan of action or steps that could be done.
content
The essay tries to discuss both sides of the issue.
content
It gives ideas on actions people and gov can take.
structure
It has a final thought that both views matter.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Discourage
  • Incentivize
  • Alternative energy
  • Public transportation
  • Lower-income
  • Carpool
  • Ride-sharing
  • Congestion
  • Urban planning
  • Pedestrian-friendly
  • Tax incentives
  • Electric and hybrid vehicles
  • Emissions standards
  • Cleaner vehicles
  • Congestion charges
  • Bicycle lanes
  • Sustainable
What to do next:
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