Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents are better caregivers for their young children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Parents
are overly occupied with work and not able to take care of their children
and opt to drop them at a daycare centre, thinking it could offer the best services. However
, there are other parents
who think their close family members, like grandparents, are more suited to take care of their children
. In my opinion, I agree that family members are the best candidates for this
role and this
essay will discuss both options below.
To begin
with, generally, grandparents are one of the most significant figures who are reliable and have proven successfully raising their children
to become responsible adults. Their experiences, knowledge, and love for their grandbabies will make them the best substitute caregivers while
their parents
are away. If the children
are staying with their grandfather and grandmother, there will be a strong bond between them. Furthermore
, young children
can play inside the house safely and comfortably within familiar surroundings.
On the other side, employees in a daycare centre usually have given appropriate training before handling customers' children
, making parents
feel safe with entrusting their children
to professionals. With their most recent knowledge, they can offer children
good toys and activities for their brain development. On the downside, the safety and hygiene at the childcare facility are uncertain, with many people coming in and out of the place. In many parts of the world, there is news of child abduction at the daycare, the culprit could be the employees or other visitors.
In conclusion, while
it is true a childcare centre is able to give one of the best services with their skilled employees, giving kids to their grandparents is safer because in a way they are also
seasoned caregivers and will give the best treatment to their own kin.Submitted by desyaf99 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that you have a well-defined introduction, body, and conclusion to structure your essay effectively. The introduction should not dive directly into the details but should instead outline the topic and your stance briefly before you elaborate in the main body.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to ensure logical flow and connection between ideas. While your essay shows some coherence, further refinement can enhance the clarity of your argument, especially when transitioning between ideas or paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide a balanced discussion of both views by dedicating equal coverage and detail to each perspective. Additionally, offer specific examples to illustrate and support each point made. These examples could be anecdotal, statistical, or hypothetical but should be directly relevant and enhance the argument.
coherence cohesion
Conclude your essay effectively by summarizing both sides of the argument and clearly restating your opinion. A stronger conclusion would reflect upon the points made in the body and offer a final, decisive statement on the topic.
task achievement
The response to the task is reasonably complete and ideas are quite clear and comprehensive. However, specificity is lacking in examples provided, which could substantiate the points made with more conviction. Provide concrete examples or reference studies, surveys, or real-life scenarios that can give weight to your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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