Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →

Introduction

The increasing rate of animal loss from their habitats is found to be a huge concern these days. One of the main drivers contributing to

this

Linking Words

trend is illegal hunting, and

therefore

Linking Words

, the government’s involvement in providing

wildlife

Use synonyms

conservation is strongly required to mitigate

this

Linking Words

matter.

Body paragraph 1

Irresponsible animal hunting stands as the primary reason for some

species

Change noun form

species'

show examples

endangerment.

This

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

the fact that some hunters might misplace their bid on pregnant mammals with long gestation periods,

thus

Linking Words

, the offspring will never be born.

For instance

Linking Words

, rampant poaching has reportedly happened in South Sulawesi, causing some pregnant elephants to die.

This

Linking Words

has caused

the

Correct article usage

show examples

delay

Change preposition

show examples

elephant breeding, as they are known to be pregnant for up to 2 years.

Body paragraph 2

To mitigate

this

Linking Words

threat, some actions should be implemented by the governments, one of them is

Change preposition

apply

show examples

providing

wildlife

Use synonyms

conservation, especially for regions with an abundance of forests.

This

Linking Words

wildlife

Use synonyms

protection could protect endangered animals and preserve these beautiful living creatures by providing an ecosystem similar to their natural habitats.

For example

Linking Words

, as the South Sulawesi’s authority has been alarmed by the decline of elephants in their region, they started to create elephant conservations.

This

Linking Words

has proven to accelerate the number of baby elephants born and encourages sustainable practices.

Conclusion

In conclusion, there has been an ongoing discussion towards animal extinctions, which are mainly caused by

outlaws

Fix the agreement mistake

outlaw

show examples

hunting since hunters often shoot at pregnant animals. Mitigations of

this

Linking Words

issue could be implemented, one of them

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

by creating

wildlife

Use synonyms

conservation by the government to protect the upbringing of these animals.

nadillamntr

Feb 11, 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

To improve your task response score, ensure your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. Your response should not only identify the reasons behind animal extinction and suggest solutions, but also explore these ideas more deeply. Add more varied examples and perspectives to fully cover the topic.

coherence cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, you have a well structured essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, work on linking ideas more smoothly between paragraphs and within them. This can be improved by varying your transitional phrases beyond just the basic connectors. Also, ensure each paragraph flows logically from one to the next, with each supporting idea clearly linked back to your main argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

species extinction
endangered animals
biodiversity
habitat loss
deforestation
urbanization
poaching
illegal wildlife trade
climate change
pollution
conservation efforts
legislation
enforcement
human overpopulation
sustainable development
responsible consumption
education
awareness programs
protected areas
wildlife reserves
international cooperation
collaboration

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
Many people feel that most of the urgent problems can only be solved by international cooperation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the contemporary globalized world, urgent challenges are becoming increasingly complex, transcending national borders and requiring collaborative efforts to find effective solutions. I staunchly agree that most pressing issues can only be adequately addressed through international cooperation due to their intricate nature and the interconnectedness of nations.
7
band
Write a letter to the hotel manager to inform, you are coming with a group of people to have a business meeting at his hotel. - Introduce yourself and the group. - Tell about the business meeting. - Inform if accommodation is necessary.
I hope you are well. I am the manager of a high-tech company. I would like to inform you that next week we have a meeting with our office staff and some dealers, which we want to arrange in your hotel. this is a business meeting, so we don't need any music system or noise.
8
band
One Of Your Friends Recently Had A Birthday Celebration, But You Missed It And You Forgot To Tell Your Friend That You Couldn’t Attend. Write A Letter To Your Friend. In Your Letter: – Explain Why You Missed It – Explain Why You Didn’t Tell Your Friend – And Say What You Would Like To Do To Show That You Are Sorry
Happy birthday to you, and I really hope that you're doing great. I'm writing this message to let you know that I feel sorry for missing you're birthday party last week. It was really out of my hand.
7
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
With technological advancements and changes in society, it is not surprising to learn that children spend extensive amounts of time on their smartphones. This short essay explores the reasons why that is the case and discusses whether it is a positive or negative phenomenon.
8
band
Some people believe that professional such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training.Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give yoyr own opinion.
Many people opine that the country which trains health professionals and engineers should bind them to work in their native areas for the betterment of their countrymen.Some folks may not agree with this idea and emphasize the freedom of employment in the country of their choice.Both these viewpoints have their own merits but I think that the sponsoring society deserves the most to reap the harvest.

Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Many people feel that most of the urgent problems can only be solved by international cooperation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to the hotel manager to inform, you are coming with a group of people to have a business meeting at his hotel. - Introduce yourself and the group. - Tell about the business meeting. - Inform if accommodation is necessary.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that professional such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training.Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give yoyr own opinion.