A lot of money is spent on repairing old building. Instead of repairing old building that money should be spent on knocking down old building and building new ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #ones

There is an ongoing

debat

Correct your spelling

debate

debit

about old-age

buildings

and whether

these construction

Change the determiner

this construction

these constructions

show examples

should be repaired or

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

replaced with brand new

buildings

. My perspective is,

although

Correct word choice

that although

show examples

traditional constructions can evoke

the

Correct article usage

show examples

sense of nostalgia, building new

ones

can be more beneficial. The following paragraphs will

diccuss

Correct your spelling

discuss

this

assertion.

To begin

with, new

buildings

are more substantial for a

sustainble

Correct your spelling

sustainable

lifestyle. It has been considered that with technological advancements, new houses are

empowerd

Correct your spelling

empowered

with

considrable

Correct your spelling

considerable

facilities which can pave the way for a suitable livelihood.

This

means that by using

divers

Correct your spelling

diverse

show examples

gadgets

Correct your spelling

show examples

a building, it will get modernised and

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

usefull

Correct your spelling

useful

for a

quilified

Correct your spelling

qualified

facilitated life.

For example

, many new constructions have

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

centeral

Correct your spelling

central

heating and a significant electronic service which are not seen in old

buildings

due to

unimproved technological devices.

Therefor

Correct your spelling

Therefore

show examples

, replacing the old

buildings

with brand new

ones

can be

remakebly

Correct your spelling

remarkably

more beneficial.

Moreover

bulding

Correct your spelling

building

new houses and departments can be

financialy

Correct your spelling

financially

more effective.In fact, constructing new homes can be significantly more

cost effective

Add a hyphen

cost-effective

show examples

than

re-newing

Correct your spelling

renewing

show examples

old

ones

, which means by replacing old

buildings

with new

ones

, the amount of expenditure will get

lessen

Wrong verb form

lessened

show examples

This

can have numerous benefits for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and can be a way to cut down the expenses and have a

considrable

Correct your spelling

considerable

budget.

Thus

, the more old

buildings

being

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

repalced

Correct your spelling

replaced

by new

ones

instead

of repairing, the more amount of money can be saved.

However

this

matter

requiers

Correct your spelling

requires

strict regulations and supervision to prevent any

misslaeding

Correct your spelling

misleading

and damage. In conclusion, my point of view is,

eventhough

Correct your spelling

even though

traditional

buildings

have

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nostalgic aspects, since building new constructions can not only be

financialy

Correct your spelling

financially

beneficial, but

also

it can boost the living

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

of residents, replacing old

ones

with new

buildings

is more suitable.

Submitted by imaneslampanahiep on Sun Feb 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

It is evident that you have structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which assists in presenting your argument. However, to further improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that signals the main idea to the reader. Additionally, work on the logical flow of your arguments by using a range of cohesive devices effectively, such as conjunctions, pronouns, and transitional phrases.

task achievement

Your task achievement is generally good as you've addressed the prompt with a clear position. To elevate this, expand on your examples by providing more depth and specificity, as this will strengthen your argument. Avoid generalities and aim to discuss real-world examples or statistics that support your viewpoint to make your argument more persuasive and complete.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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A lot of money is spent on repairing old building. Instead of repairing old building that money should be spent on knocking down old building and building new ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think restoration of old buildings take huge amount of government expenditure. It would be more beneficial to use this money for development of new buildings and roads. To what extent do you agree/disagree with the statement

Some people think that it is important to have a single language as an official international language. Others think that it will make it difficult to identify countries and cause a loss of culture. what are your opinion on this?

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Students should not be allowed to use mobile phones at school. Do you agree or disagree with this view

Some people think that children should start formal education as early as possible, where as other people think children should not start until the age of Discuss both views and give your own opinion.