It is important for the people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
It is crucial for people to take risks in their
life
, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. In my opinion, being Fix the agreement mistake
lives
risk-taker
might be good and have several advantages, Correct article usage
a risk-taker
however
, this
case might have some drawbacks as well.
Being risk-taker
in some parts of your life could be beneficial. If you take risks, you will get some Correct article usage
a risk-taker
experiences
as well. Try new foods and outfits can change the way you eat or wear. Fix the agreement mistake
experience
Furthermore
, try
several fields of Wrong verb form
trying
studying
might give people more Replace the word
study
viewpoint
about what they will study in the future. Fix the agreement mistake
viewpoints
For instance
, I studied medicine for two years straight and had no idea how much passion and interest I had for math. Hence
, I took a risk
and started studying for next year’s math entrance exam. Now, I am studying computer science duo
to the Correct your spelling
due
risk
I took one year ago.
As it
mentioned, being Correct pronoun usage
apply
risk-taker
could be harmful too. There are some risks in today’s world Correct article usage
a risk-taker
which are
Verb problem
that
existed
to tempt you to take them and damage your life, Wrong verb form
exist
money
and family. One of them is gambling, put your money
in some easy and simple games and expect that your money
will doubled
or increase significantly. Bet sites and casinos are there to tempt you to take a Change the verb form
be doubled
double
risk
and get rid of your money
. However
, unfortunately, numerous people cheated
to take a Wrong verb form
cheat
risk
and they lose large amount
of Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
money
.
Overall
, as it
mentioned, Correct pronoun usage
apply
although
being risk-taker
might be beneficial and if you take a Correct article usage
a risk-taker
risk
in the right way you will gain some experiences and achievements, it has some disadvantages as well.Submitted by amirkasrajahanmiri on
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Task Achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view on the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks, which is good for addressing the prompt. To improve your Task Achievement score, try to present your points with more elaboration and depth, providing a thorough explanation of how the advantages can outweigh the disadvantages, or vice versa, depending on your stance. Make sure to respond directly to the question by clearly stating if the advantages do or do not outweigh the disadvantages.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a fundamental structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is positive. However, to enhance the Coherence and Cohesion of your essay, focus on creating stronger topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph more clearly, and use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas within and across sentences. Moreover, aim to create a more logical progression of ideas throughout your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.