some say that increasing price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pu0llution problems. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

High
Correct article usage
The high
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prevalence of using motorized vehicles results in heavy
traffic
, and air and noise pollution in city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
,
hence
some
people
offer to increase
oil
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
to reduce the high demand for operating motorized vehicles. Since
this
process may result in unexpected troubles in suburban areas, and may put
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
pressure on the budgets of
people
, I disagree with
this
idea. One of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
why increasing
oil
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
should not be embraced as an effective solution is
this
approach may adversely affect individuals, who reside in suburban areas. To illustrate, some
people
prefer to live
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
far away from the city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
, in order to escape from the hustle and bustle of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
city life.
As a result
, they have to drive or take a bus for their daily commute. It can be easily stated that in case of an incline in the
oil
price
, these
people
's expenditures rise dramatically.
Moreover
, some of them may decide to quit with the aim of saving money.
For instance
, nearly 40
people
resigned
last
month in Istanbul
due to
fact
Correct article usage
the fact
show examples
that expenses related to everyday
commute
Fix the agreement mistake
commutes
show examples
almost doubled in the
last
two months.
To sum up
, rising
oil
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
may alleviate the
traffic
jam
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jams
show examples
as
people
tend to quit
to drive
Change the verb form
driving
show examples
, but
this
approach may end up in unemployment, for that reason, I do not support
this
idea.
On the other hand
, increasing
price
Correct article usage
the price
show examples
oil
Change preposition
of oil
show examples
leads to
rise
Correct article usage
a rise
show examples
transportation
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in transportation
show examples
fees, in turn, every
items'
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item's
show examples
price
on shelves is likely to go up. To
examplify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, as companies have to pay more for fuel for lorries, they tend to increase the
price
of the products, in order to make
profit
Add an article
a profit
show examples
.
As a consequence
, customers may face overprized items in supermarkets.
For example
, the
price
of cartoon
milks
Change the wording
milk
kinds of milk
bowls of milk
pints of milk
glasses of milk
show examples
has been increasing significantly in recent years, owing to
war
Correct article usage
the war
show examples
between Russia and Ukraine. If
authoritites
Correct your spelling
authorities
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
the
oil
price
in order to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pollution or
traffic
, the pressure on citizen's
budget
Fix the agreement mistake
budgets
show examples
, inevitably, peaks.
Therefore
, governments should not
impelement
Correct your spelling
implement
policies for increasing
oil
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
.
To conclude
,
while
some believe that increasing
petrol
Correct article usage
the petrol
show examples
price
would be be most effective way to address heavy
traffic
and pollution, I personally do not support
this
idea since
this
approach may result in more serious situations including unemployment, and financial strain
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
society.
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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task achievement
Ensure a clear position throughout the essay; maintain consistency in argumentation regarding the extent of agreement or disagreement.
task achievement
Try to expand on the examples given, ensuring that they are fully developed and detailed to support your main points.
coherence and cohesion
Work on creating more cohesive devices and transition phrases to better link ideas and paragraphs together.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure the introduction and conclusion mirror each other in stating your viewpoint and summarizing the main argument.
task achievement
Avoid general statements and strive for more precision in the language, avoiding ambiguity.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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