Shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity. However, some people feel that this has both positive and negative effects. Why is shopping so popular? What effects does its increase in popularity have on individuals and on society?

I think shopping is becoming more and more popular as a leisure activity.
For example
The Tree Plan Shopping
Center
as
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
a
Change the article
the
show examples
biggest shopping
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
in Adelaide. I'm working
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
take way
Correct your spelling
takeway
shop in the T.T.P. Shopping
center
. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
huge
Change the article
a huge
the huge
show examples
number of
coutner
Correct your spelling
counter
working around in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
every day. Many
people
buy lots of
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
, drinks,
Correct word choice
and
show examples
clothes and They are
hand carry
Correct your spelling
hand-carried
show examples
or
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
put in the trolly.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
some
peple
Correct your spelling
people
me only window shopping. I
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
worry about
people
who
bought
Wrong verb form
buy
show examples
many things into trolly, because I think
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
they
are use
Change the verb form
are used
are using
show examples
anoney
Correct your spelling
money
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
, and
also
some ladies who wear a looks expensive
juellies
Correct your spelling
jellies
jollies
. I have one friend who
bankenrupt his self
Correct your spelling
bankrupted himself
, because he had
a
Change the article
an
show examples
expensive can,
a
Change the article
an
show examples
expensive cloth. etc. I think
bad
Add an article
the bad
show examples
effect is many loan
company
Change to a plural noun
companies
show examples
estblished
Correct your spelling
established
Change preposition
in those
show examples
those year
Change the determiner
that year
those years
show examples
.
People
are easy to borrow money
trough
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
loan
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
and easy to go to
bankalpt
Correct your spelling
bankrupt
.
People
must
concider
Correct your spelling
consider
about when they go
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shopping.
Therefore
before
buy
Change the verb form
buying
show examples
something
people
proust
Correct your spelling
first
consider
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
shopping
such
as for yourself.
Submitted by Serhii Baraniuk on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Try to include a clear introduction that presents the topic and your viewpoint. This will help readers understand the purpose of your essay.
Paragraph Structure
Organize your essay into paragraphs, each addressing a specific point. A structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion can greatly improve clarity and cohesion.
Vocabulary
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and avoid repetition. This can make your essay more interesting and engaging.
Grammar and Punctuation
Pay attention to grammar and punctuation. Correct use of these can significantly improve the readability of your essay.
Supporting Examples
Provide clear examples to support your main points. This strengthens your argument and makes your essay more convincing.
Balanced Discussion
Consider discussing both positive and negative effects in a balanced manner. This will demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Topic Relevance
Addresses the topic and attempts to discuss both the popularity of shopping and its effects.
Personal Insight
Shares personal observations and experiences, which adds a unique perspective to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure activity
  • consumer culture
  • emotional satisfaction
  • consumerism
  • advertising influence
  • online shopping platforms
  • sense of pleasure
  • social interaction
  • boost the economy
  • compulsive shopping
  • materialism
  • environmental degradation
  • unsustainable demand
  • social inequalities
  • status through possessions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: