Some people believe that it is better to live and work in vertical cities. Others, however, think that horizontal cities are better for living and working. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There are two different
type
Change to a plural noun
types
show examples
of
cities
, which are named vertical city and horizontal city.
While
som
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
people believe that residing in vertical
cities
provides more benefits,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others hold the
opposide
Correct your spelling
opposite
show examples
idea.
This
essay will explain both sides
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and highlight vertical towns may be
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
option since they prevent urban sprawl. On one hand, a group of people argue that horizontal
cities
are better for living since
this kind
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
show examples
of
cities
offer a life in nature. To illustrate, as horizontal
cities
tend to spread, they contain several green areas and
park
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parks
show examples
,
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
ensure more connection with nature.
For example
, a worker can refresh his mind after a gruelling meeting, by walking ten minutes in a park, which is close to their workplace. Since horizontal
cities
give more opportunities to access greeneries than vertical
cities
, may provide more comfortable lives for citizens,
according to
some.
On the other hand
, proponents of vertical
cities
believe that building high-rise buildings should be accepted as an effective way to create more organised
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cities
. To clarify, as multi-storey apartments
are enable
Change the verb form
are enabled
show examples
to host many individuals, they provide more intense areas either
residental
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residential
areas or workplaces.
Therefore
, the whole
banks
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bank
show examples
can be built
at
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on
show examples
a
spesific
Correct your spelling
specific
land, and all of the hospitals can be
contruct
Correct your spelling
constructed
at another certain place.
For instance
, all of the hospitals have been placed
at
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in
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the north part of Istanbul in recent years,
hence
transporting patients from
a
Correct determiner usage
one
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hospital to another has become less risky in comparison with the past.
Finally
, I personally advocate that vertical
cities
are better
alternative
Fix the agreement mistake
alternatives
show examples
for living, and working. One of the reasons is that constructing high-rise buildings is preventing
urban-sprawn
Correct your spelling
urban sprawl
in city
centers
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centres
show examples
.
In other words
, a multi-storey
apartmant
Correct your spelling
apartment
contains nearly 60 condos,
while
a traditional
apartman
Correct your spelling
apartment
block contains just 5 housings.
As a result
, horizontal
cities
have to spread in
otder
Correct your spelling
order
to provide
enought
Correct your spelling
enough
accommodations for
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
.
Wtih
Correct your spelling
With
the aim of preventing
urban-sprawl
Correct your spelling
urban sprawl
show examples
, vertical
cities
would be accepted
a
Change preposition
as a
show examples
better alternative.
To conclude
, when all these factors are taken into
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
account, both kinds of
cities
have valid points.
While
horizontal
cities
are able to provide a life closer the nature, vertical
cities
make it possible to create more organized towns. I
personaly
Correct your spelling
personally
support the latter idea, which
advocate
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advocates
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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vertical
cities
, since veritval
cities
enable to
reduce
Replace the word
reduction
show examples
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
risk of
urban-sprawl
Correct your spelling
urban sprawl
show examples
.
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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Coherence & cohesion
Consider using a wider range of linking words to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will improve the flow of your essay.
Logical structure
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines the main points you will discuss. Your conclusion should succinctly summarize these points and your stance.
Supported main points
Provide more varied and detailed examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay by showing how your ideas apply in real-world contexts.
Task Achievement
Ensure your essay fully addresses the task by discussing both views equally before presenting your own opinion. Make sure your opinion is clear throughout the essay.
Clear & comprehensive ideas
Work on developing clear, comprehensive ideas in each paragraph. Try to delve deeper into why each view might be held and how it affects individuals and society.
Relevant & specific examples
Incorporate specific, relevant examples to strengthen your arguments further. These examples help illustrate your points and make your arguments more convincing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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