people have difference visions about shopping online some of them encourage and others says its disadvantage outweigh their advantage, what is your opinion?

These days, the development of technology has led to buying

stuff

online becoming a habit in society.

While

some people tend to suggest it, others believe that it has more drawbacks rather than benefits. It is my belief that purchasing things from the Internet has advantages that surpass its disadvantages for the following reasons. On the one hand, online shopping could save more

time

and energy rather than buying straight from the store.

For example

, customers need to spare their

time

to take a trip to the store,

not to mention

the money they spend on gas or public transportation tickets. Meanwhile, online shopping does not need customer presence, they only need to log into shopping platforms and choose everything they would like to buy without having any interaction with the staff. In

this

case, online shopping is more convenient for busy people.

On the other hand

, online shopping lacks in customers' experience to feel the materials or to at least do a trial of the

stuff

they want to buy.

Although

reviews from former customers are provided on the platform, it does not mean everybody will accept them since the reviews are written based on the opinion of the reviewer only. So online shopping would likely cause more disappointment after the

stuff

is received by the customer. After taking everything into consideration, I would say online shopping has more benefits for the sake of

time

Moreover

, the occurrence of bad

stuff

I mentioned above could be avoided by taking more

time

to read the review of the products.

Submitted by pocutarifahzahrina on Wed Apr 03 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider enhancing the diversity of linking words to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs, further improving the coherence of your essay.

task achievement

While your examples are relevant, try to integrate more diverse and detailed examples to strengthen your arguments and provide a more in-depth analysis.

coherence cohesion

You have provided a well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, effectively addressing the topic.

task achievement

Your position is clear throughout the essay, demonstrating a good understanding of the task requirements.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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people have difference visions about shopping online some of them encourage and others says its disadvantage outweigh their advantage, what is your opinion?

The crime rate in teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries in recent years. What are the causes, and what are the solutions?

Write an essay discussing the significance of renewable energy and arguing for its pivotal role in addressing the environmental challenges our planet faces. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 per cent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree?

In the future more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. Do you agree or disagree?j

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?