At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults,compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of the situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
No one can deny that the global young people population are gradually rising compared to older population.
Add an article
the
an
Although
this
can bring some disadvantages, I am more inclined toward its advantages.In this
essay ,I will discuss both the negative and the positive aspect
.
In terms of downsides, a young individual is most likely unskilled and lacks Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
of
knowledge about life and job.Remove the preposition
apply
Apart from
this
, it has a huge impact on society as well if the younger race with a negative education background has been involved with drugs and crime .For example
,knowledge transfer can be strengthened in societies with more mature people because they have been exposed to the world for a longer period of time.Therefore
,expertise is needed for a better future.However
, the right education and guidance can be provided to the young ones so that they are on the road to good improvement.
On the other hand
, the upsides of this
phenomenon outweigh its drawbacks. To begin
with, the youngsters are fast learner and young.For example
, the technologies in this
era are advancing , and young adults are more suitable to take part in research and explore the world because it takes years to completed
the tasks.Wrong verb form
complete
Nevertheless
, the youths also
produce a
good productivity compared to old people because of their stamina and health issues. Remove the article
apply
In addition
, a company that hired more young workers have increased the value of the company.
In conclusion,a large figure of young humans compared to ageing adults will have both pros and cons but I believe that the benefits are more considerable.Submitted by tifjong on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Expand and diversify the examples provided to better support your points. This will not only enrich your argument but also demonstrate your ability to draw from a wider range of sources and experiences.
coherence & cohesion
Strive for clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your essay. This will enhance the overall flow and clarity of your argument.
coherence & cohesion
Consider refining and structuring your introduction and conclusion more distinctly. While present, these could be sharpened to preview and recap your main points more effectively.
overall
Be cautious with spelling, punctuation, and grammatical structures. Mistakes can detract from the clarity of your argument and may lead to misunderstandings.