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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tables #information #sales #coffee #bananas #five #european #countries #summarise #features #comparisons
The Tables provide information about Five different countries
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
sales
Replace the word
sold
show examples
 their product in 1999 and 2004 .
Overall
,
Official
Correct article usage
the Official
show examples
 fair
price
 for
Banana
Fix the agreement mistake
bananas
show examples
 and Coffee in 2004
experiencing
Wrong verb form
experienced
show examples
Correct article usage
an increased
show examples
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
whereas
Denmark
 and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the country who get paid
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
higher
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
whike
Correct your spelling
whereas
 Sweden was the least.
According to
 the data, in 1999 the higher
official
Change the word
officially
show examples
 agreed fair
price
 for Coffee
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 Switzerland
which is
Verb problem
was
show examples
 about 3
million
euros
. Following that,
Denmark
 and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 almost shared similar
payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments
show examples
whereas
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the number calculated
by
Change preposition
as
show examples
 1.8
million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
euros
 for
Denmark
 followed by
UK
 1.5
million
euros
.
However
, Belgium only paid less
ammount
Correct your spelling
amount
 of money.
On the other hand
, in 2004 the Fair
price
 for
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 dramatically to 20
million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
euros
 and Switzerland
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
thereefold
Correct your spelling
threefold
 higher than before.
Moreover
, coffee
farmer
Fix the agreement mistake
farmers
show examples
 in
Denmark
 after five years did not show
much
Rephrase
as much
show examples
 progression as
Belgium
Change preposition
in Belgium
show examples
 and Sweden. The number just increased by 2 % from the previous years.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words price, denmark, uk, million, euros with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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