IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make a comparison where relevant. Write atleast 150 words.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make a comparison where relevant. Write atleast 150 words.
#information #families #country #income #summarise #features #comparison #atleast
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The chart
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 the differences
expenditure
Change preposition
in expenditure
show examples
 of
families
Use synonyms
 in one country by
earnings
Use synonyms
 in 1968 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest of percentages by
families
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
purchases
Wrong verb form
purchasing
show examples
 their
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
 are food in 1968,
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leisure
is
Verb problem
spent
show examples
 the most
earnings
Use synonyms
 spent by
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
 in 2018.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel
Use synonyms
 and
power
Use synonyms
 are the lowest of
earnings
Use synonyms
purchases
Use synonyms
 by
families
Use synonyms
 in 1968 and 2018. In 1968, Food
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 the highest expenditure by
families
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 country at 35%. The second
common
Correct quantifier usage
most common
show examples
purchases
Use synonyms
 by
families
Use synonyms
 are housing, and clothing and footwear at 10%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the household
goods
Use synonyms
 have
similarity
Replace the word
similar
show examples
 percentages by spending the
earnings
Use synonyms
 with personal
goods
Use synonyms
, transport,
fuel
Use synonyms
 and
power
Use synonyms
, and leisure at over
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
8%. The
last
Linking Words
 buying by
families
Use synonyms
 are
fuel
Use synonyms
 and
power
Use synonyms
 only around
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
5%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the trend of
families
Use synonyms
improve
Change the verb form
improves
show examples
 after 50 years. The most common
Use synonyms
purchases
Fix the agreement mistake
purchase
show examples
 weekly income by
families
Use synonyms
 is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leisure over
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
20% in 2018. Afterwards, food and housing are the second highest
families
Use synonyms
 expenditure their money at around 18%. The household
goods
Use synonyms
 and transport spent by
families
Use synonyms
 over at 5%. The lowest
purchases
Use synonyms
 by
families
Use synonyms
earnings
Use synonyms
 are
fuel
Use synonyms
 and
power
Use synonyms
 and personal
goods
Use synonyms
 at less
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
 5%.
Submitted by azizahqonitas on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words families, earnings, purchases, fuel, power, goods with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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