IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Your friend has written a letter to you asking for advice regarding a visit that his/her parents will be making to your area in the near future. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, recommend a place where they can stay suggest the places they can visit offer to do something with them.

#friend #advice #visit #parents #area #future #place #places #offer
Dear Tajinder, I hope you are doing great. I’m writing to offer suggestions for your parents' upcoming visit to my city to see popular places in my area. There are several places where they can stay during the trip like hotels, motels and a rented house. I
also
 prefer that they stay at my home as I
also
 know each other and it will be a great opportunity to spend time together.
Moreover
, being a tourist place my town has old castles, historical temples and an ancient fort which are the most renowned places in my area.
In addition
, one art traditional gallery is a place where we can get knowledge about the creativity of ancient writers and painters.
Furthermore
, they can visit museums and theatres where they watch old movies of their young age and
also
 try Indian food at the Swiss chalet. I hope they’ll have a wonderful experience over here. Please contact me anytime for any other information and I'll meet them soon. Best regards, Love
Submitted by tajinder.panag on

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Task Response
To improve task response, ensure that each component of the question is fully addressed. While you recommended a place to stay and suggested places to visit, elaborating more on each suggestion and providing more specific details could enhance the response. For example, mentioning why your home is a preferable option for their stay or giving more specific reasons why the castles and temples are worth visiting would strengthen the letter.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, consider structuring your paragraphs more clearly around each topic. Each paragraph should focus on a specific point: one for the accommodation, one for the places to visit, and one for the activities you can do together. Additionally, using a wider range of linking phrases to connect ideas more smoothly can enhance the flow of the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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