Some people believe that starting school at early age is very benificial for children while others believe that children must stay home an attend school at the age of seven. In your opinion,what are the advantages of attending school before the age of seven.
In modern society,young
children
should go to school
for accepted knowledge.Howewer
,there is an argument regarding Correct your spelling
However
this
topic.While
some people believe that starting school
at early
Add an article
an early
age
is very benificial
for them Correct your spelling
beneficial
develop
their social skills,Fix the infinitive
to develop
other
parts believe that Fix the agreement mistake
others
children
must stay home an
attend Correct your spelling
and
school
at the age
of seven.With these viewpoints,both opinions andy
Correct your spelling
and
perspective
will be discussed Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
this
essay.
Change preposition
in this
To begin
with,a number of people argue that starting school
early age
is benificial
for social skills.Correct your spelling
beneficial
This
perspective can be based on human psychosocial development.Morever
, Correct your spelling
Moreover
children
until six or seven age
should spend time with family
circle,friends,Add an article
a family
the family
Correct word choice
and kindegarten
kindegarten
.If Correct your spelling
kindergarten
children
would be
start Verb problem
apply
school
at early
Add an article
an early
age
,children
come across some problems.Such
as,
mental or moral stress Remove the comma
apply
In addition
,children
getting
tired same job and a number of parents worry about their behavior. Wrong verb form
get
Children
always
busy with educational homework.
Add a missing verb
are always
On the other hand
,all parents always
Add a missing verb
are always
responsibile
for Correct your spelling
responsible
Correct pronoun usage
their children
children
life and their important education.They should learn infantʼs Change noun form
children's
ability
and Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
talent
which are listening Fix the agreement mistake
talents
music
,Change preposition
to music
sport
or clear speaking .Fix the agreement mistake
sports
Howewer
some Correct your spelling
However
children
does
not need to Correct subject-verb agreement
do
forced
at an early Add a missing verb
be forced
age
.
To sum up
,in my opinion,we should give a chance them to live free
during their childhood.Believe that Replace the word
freely
children
must stay home an
attend Correct your spelling
and
school
at the age
of seven.Submitted by omondavlat91 on
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Task Achievement
To strengthen your essay, begin by ensuring a stronger stance or opinion in your introduction. This statement will guide the reader and set a clear direction for your essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve clarity and cohesion, aim for more precise connections between ideas. Use transitional phrases like 'Furthermore,' 'On the contrary,' or 'As a result' to link sentences and paragraphs seamlessly.
Task Achievement
In terms of task achievement, aim to include more specific examples or personal anecdotes to support your arguments. This will add depth and interest to your essay, making your points more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
To avoid repetition and enhance vocabulary diversity, try integrating synonyms or alternative expressions. This will enrich the text and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.